Would you tell or keep quiet?

posted 2 months ago in Beehive
Post # 211
Member
4926 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

bywater :  better a tattletale than a spineless bystander watching these women live a lie, having their lives endangered by possible STIs from their cheating partners.

Post # 213
Member
1358 posts
Bumble bee

I’d tell, anonymously. What the gfs choose to do about it is up to them. Make an obscure email, send it from a coffeeshop wifi. Clear your conscience. 

Post # 214
Member
551 posts
Busy bee

I’d probably tell them in your situation. I’d also not expect to be thanked/appreciated for it and wouldn’t expect them to ever want to see me again. So you’ll probably be losing some sort-of-close-but-not friends, but that’s the trade-off.

Post # 215
Member
182 posts
Blushing bee

ecrisrien :  From what she said in her update, she must have already informed at least one woman by now.

Post # 216
Member
2919 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

chocco :  any update op, how did it go?

Post # 217
Member
465 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

bywater :  “Tattletale”? Are you 12 years old? This is serious business, not a pinch on the arm that you tell your teacher about. 

Post # 218
Member
1236 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

bywater :  WTF? So you think it’s okay for someone to get cheated on and not find out?

You’ve obviously never been cheated on, because it sucks and what sucks even more is finding out that people in your life knew about it and didn’t tell you. This is why I ended friendships after I found out a serious boyfriend cheated on me. If you knew and you weren’t friend enough to tell me, then you’re not a real friend and I can’t count on you.

And–for the record–it was the guys who started the drama by cheating on their girlfriends’. OP is not fanning the flames, she is being a decent person.

chocco :  How did it go? I think your fiance not coming to meet with the girl was the right call, more privacy for when you told her.

Post # 219
Member
665 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

obviousanonymous : iI swear to god I was just about to say the same thing.  Tattletale…shm

Post # 221
Member
725 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

 

bywater :  

there is nothing nice about you. I’m glad the majority of women on here actually care about helping the world be a better place and don’t agree with you. If everyone stood around refusing to call people out for dangerous, inappropriate, or bad behavior than this world would be a much shittier place. 
guess what? I see a drunk driver on the road, I call it in. I see a creep on the bus trying to grope another woman I help her and loudly tell him to back off. Because If the drunk driver killed someone because I didn’t call it in? That’s on me, if something happened to that woman on the bus because I didn’t say anything? That’s on me. And because I’d want someone to help me/ report a drunk driver if I was driving on that freeway. It’s called being a good person.

– these guys who cheated did it Infront of multiple people

– they then talked about it openly. 

if you want to be an Asshole than do it on your own time and don’t broadcast it to people. But no, we aren’t going to sit here and act like immature teenagers whining that someone is a tattletale. Grow up. Don’t want to get shit? Don’t do shitty things. Period. 

Post # 222
Member
4225 posts
Honey bee

All right this is over the top. People are allowed to express opinions that do not agree with yours and should not be labeled assholes for doing so. The fact is a lot of people would turn the other way, bywater is not alone. So enough with the venom, this isn’t a vent thread. 

 

Post # 223
Member
262 posts
Helper bee

sunburn :  It’s true that many people would turn the other way, and others have expressed that view without calling OP names. There was no need for her to make insulting remarks about the OP and that was why people reacted how they did.

Post # 224
Member
465 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

sunburn :  People aren’t upset with what she said merely because she disagreed; they’re upset with the content of what she said and the way in which she said it. Rather than actually provide any sort of logical argument or perspective, she moved right to childish name-calling. 

And you, of all people, lecturing others about their “venom” is hilarious. 

Post # 225
Member
725 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

sunburn :  no one called anyone on this thread an asshole. If your comment is referring to my recent comment go read it again. I said in regards to these guys who cheated, and anyone else who tries to get upset about being told on for their bad behavior, that If you don’t want to be in trouble for bad behavior aka being an asshole, than just don’t be an Asshole. 

I don’t appreciate YOU escalating a comment into something it wasn’t. Only person fanning flames here is you. 

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