(Closed) Would you wear a dress from a previous engagement?

posted 7 years ago in Dress
  • poll: Would you wear it?

    Yes

    No

    Other (Explain)

  • Post # 47
    Member
    247 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I say go for it! As others have said, you could perhaps alter it or dress it up with other accesories, it is your dress ofr your wedding day 🙂 

    Post # 48
    Member
    3196 posts
    Sugar bee

    No way! I’d sell or donate it and start over with something different. I just don’t think that I’d be planning the same wedding/theme to someone who wasn’t my Fiance (now DH) as I had the first time, if I was planning on marrying a different person. 

    Post # 49
    Member
    1245 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I would have no problems, what’s so ever, wearing it. 

    Post # 50
    Member
    543 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I did!!!  I bought my dream dress when I thought I was engaged to my dream guy.  I was wrong about one of them lol. I was with someone for 7 years and 6 months before our wedding I found out he molested a child.  Naturally I called things off.  It was really awkward because I had ordered the dress and it came in 2 months after the breakup.  When the salon called I had to go and pick up the dress and the ditzy consultants we’re all wanting to talk about my wedding plans which had been completely called off.  I did my best not to break down and cry since I didn’t want to ruin the experience for all the blushing brides and their families around me.  It was heart wrenching.  I thought about donating the dress on the spot but decided to try it on one last time despite the pain I knew it would cause.  I had waited 8 months and spent $1000 to see this dress on me in my size.  I tried it on in the salon that day and decided to keep it and hopefully use it one day.

    It sat in a closet at home until, to my surprise, I got engaged just 6 months later to a real catch.  I asked my new fiance (now hubby) if he would be terribly offended if I wore a dress I had purchased to marry my ex.  We talked about it practically and agreed that if I had actually married him in the dress, it would be different but since I never got that far it was okay.  He just made me promise that when I looked at the dress I didn’t think of my ex and the truth is I didn’t.  My ex had never seen the dress.  Furthermore, I was supposed to go dress shopping with my mom and my ex’s mom and one had a scheduling conflict while the other flaked on me.  I went dress shopping on my own anyways.  It was the second dress I ever tried on and I bought it that day without consulting anyone with my own money.  I have a feeling that if either one of them had gone with me to buy it, I would think of my previous wedding plans or my ex whenever I saw the dress.  I got lucky there.  

    We seem to overestimate the meaning of wedding dresses because of the commitment we make in them or plan to.  But the truth is they are just cloth, expensive fabric that only has the meaning we give it.  I thought it would be weird for me to plan a new wedding with the old dress but I realized it would be weirder to pretend I didn’t absolutely love something I had already decided on.  Definitely ask your fiance because how he feels about it counts. If mine had expressed concern I would have picked another dress in a heartbeat.  But most guys are okay with you keeping the dress you have if it means being reasonable to save money.  If he knows you love it chances are he will just want to make you happy.  Good luck.  Oh and because I love to show it off, here is me finally getting married in my dream dress.

    Post # 51
    Member
    11498 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I was engaged once before, 17 years before I married my DH, and I had a fabulous, gorgeous, expensive (it retailed for $1,700 more than 20 years ago, just to give you some idea — I’m sure it easily would sell for more than $3K today) tulle dress with reimbroidered, Alencon lace and hand-sewn beading. 

    I loved it. It’s spectacular-looking in person, and it easily should be able to be altered into a strapless gown and would look much like some of the other beautiful, tulle gowns that I’ve seen in the HIVE.

    I definitely would have considered wearing it if I had met my DH earlier. Although I had some concerns about the style perhaps being too youthful-looking for me by that point (I married at 47), the primary reason I did not wear it is that it would not have fit me.  The dress was a bridal size ten, and I was wearing plus sized clothing by the time I was married.

    The dress is safely put away, and I hope one day someone in my family will be able to wear it, or perhaps I will try to sell it some day. Here are some (not very good) cell phone pics of the ad from a 1992 Brides’ Magazine:

    Post # 52
    Member
    155 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I would do it! I can’t imagine a dress can change anything about your marriage, but I’m pretty practical. I hope he proposes soon 🙂

    Post # 53
    Member
    1497 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    You bought the dress because you liked it and it looked good on you, right? Not because it matched your former Fiance. If you still feel the same way about the dress now as the day you bought it, you should wear it!

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