(Closed) Would you wear the same heirloom diamond for two marriages?

posted 5 years ago in Rings
  • poll: Would you wear the heirloom diamond a second time?

    Yes.

    No way

  • Post # 2
    Member
    1072 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2017

    I’d wear it as a RHR

    Post # 3
    Member
    1117 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    I said no, but I think that is more of an emotional reaction based on my prior circumstances. I had an heirloom diamond from my ex husband’s mother. It was her diamond from when she married his father. Their marriage ended in a nasty divorce, I ended up having a really bad/strained relationship with her and I just started feeling like it was cursed. Was it a beautiful, good quality diamond? Yes. But all I saw was ugliness. I would never use it again.

    Post # 4
    Member
    6331 posts
    Bee Keeper

    The value of the stone comes from its history from your grandma. Reusing such a large stone would surely save you some money too. You could always reset it if you didn’t want the bad juju from the first failed marriage. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    7440 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Same diamond, different setting. The diamond itself is not cursed. Placing such a stigma on a rock is odd. If the new husband had hesitation though, then that is something for them to discuss and find another solution.

    Post # 6
    Member
    914 posts
    Busy bee

    I’d absolutely use the diamond and reset it into a setting that represents your friend and her future Fiance. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1974 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2019

    I wouldn’t, but that doesn’t matter. You say she loves the ring. If her boyfriend is happy, then I can’t see why she shouldn’t wear it again. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    478 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2017

    this diamond doesn’t belong to her ex’s family. It was her grandmother’s so I don’t see it being a problem. And if set in a different setting I don’t think it would make her think of her previous relationship/marriage. I think she should try and make it as different of a setting as possible. Different metal different style. So that it doesn’t seem like the same ring at all.

    Also, I think there are cleansing ceremonies one can do to remove the bad juju from a gem? 🙂 Maybe she could look into that!

    Post # 10
    Member
    1949 posts
    Buzzing bee

    It really is up to her.  I would not have a problem with it.  The setting wil be different and it is a way to keep the memory of a loved one close.  If the BF has an issue with it they should have a conversation about that. It seems unreasonable to reject an heirloom diamond that clearly your Girlfriend loves for superstitious reasons.  

    Post # 11
    Member
    1227 posts
    Bumble bee

    Since it comes from her side of the family I’d feel comfortable using it. I would not feel comfortable using the same setting. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    1449 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    Same stone – no issues. 

    Same setting/ring – definitely not. 

    Id tell your friend to have it reset in a new setting tha her and her boyfriend pick out together so that it is a “new ring” for the two of them. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    250 posts
    Helper bee

    I agree with PPs. I would use the same diamond in a different setting just so it can “feel” like a different ring. It would be different if the diamond was from her ex husband’s family.

    Post # 14
    Member
    4811 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2010

    I don’t believe in bad juju and such. I do believe in using things you already have and love, if you can and want to. I would have no problem reusing the diamond. If it is not in the original setting grandma had, I would probably reset it so it is a bit different though than before.

    Post # 15
    Member
    5995 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Absoluely ok to do it! The heirloom was from HER family, not her ex.

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