(Closed) Wow. Just…wow.

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
1318 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

I have one friend who is very upset that she and her husband are not invited to our wedding.  I’m having a small, 50 person wedding 2.5 hrs away (so that I could keep it small!) and explained that it’s pretty much family only and she was upset.  I haven’t heard from her since before Christmas, and she used to call all of the time.  Some people just don’t get it, and it’s more important to them to be involved than to just be happy for you.

Post # 18
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I get the feeling flattered thing, but I don’t think I could EVER ask somebody if I were invited to their wedding. Who doesn’t know how awkward that is?! Why do they want to start an awkward conversation? 

Post # 19
766 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Nay1976:  I’m fortunate in that no one has asked me that question yet! One of my friends got married about two years ago and I was surprised that I wasn’t invited. I mean, we weren’t bffs super close, but we had a ton of classes together and would study together frequently. I’d never have the balls to ask why, though. I figured that everyone has a budget- she’s just trying to stick to hers. 

Post # 20
2091 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I have mixed feelings about this issue. I have explained more than once about my 50-52 people wedding. Some people who ask me are coming from a sweet and kind place. Others have a sense of entitlement about being invited and I do not get it. We are not that close and some of them I have not seen for years. A wedding is not supposed to be an event where you invite EVERYONE that you have ever seen or spoken with once or twice. Part of the problem is that some of these affairs are super lavish and have an insane amount of guests. People sometime expect everyone to have giant events. I am paying for it and I have a specific budget; even if I had more money to spend I would use it to enhance the quality of the event more than inviting a buttload of people. I am not offended if I don’t get invited to an event (unless someone went out of their way to promise to invite me and later change their mind). It is strange that folks just assume they will be invited.

On a side note, my Fiance says that people at work, including supervisors have been saying they would buy excellent gifts and would like to cozy up to him to get an invitation! I think that they are just kidding around for the most part, but I am surprised how much folks want to be involved…

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