(Closed) WOW. Ridiculous fight with shoplifting, arrogant ex-friend. Was I in the wrong?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Should I have brought up her shoplifting? Would you ever forgive her for what she said? Pick 2.
    No, bringing up her shoplifting was a low blow. Let her think she doesn't break rules. : (7 votes)
    6 %
    Yes, she was acting like she never breaks rules, and you had evidence to the contrary. : (59 votes)
    48 %
    No, I would never forgive her calling me "socially inept" and saying I had no friends. : (46 votes)
    37 %
    Yes, she was angry because you had thrown a low blow. : (12 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I only made it halfway through this post. This whole thing sounds childish and dramatic for no reason. If she is your ex friend then let it go and move on with your life.

    Post # 4
    Member
    4275 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    No, you were not wrong, although it did not seem to do much good. I am actually surprised you put up with someone like that for so long without going ballistic on her.

    I had a friend in college that had a severe anger/attitude problem. She had no friends but me. She was constantly picking fights with her boyfriend with me right there and one day she punched a hole in the wall. This is why. She was talking on the phone with her boyfriend and said, “A guy checked me out earlier and told me I was hot.” Boyfriend, “Okay.” Her, “OKAY??!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN OKAY?!!! YOU SHOULD BE UPSET! A GUY TOTALLY CHECKED ME OUT!!”

    She threw her phone and BAM! Punched a whole in the wall.

    Friendship was over after that. Who needs to be around someone like that??

    Post # 5
    Member
    4371 posts
    Honey bee

    @hidingmyface: fwiw, youre actually correct in that pedestrians should walk “into” traffic. Anyway, I wouldnt spend more time worrying about this “friend.” She sounds like a toxic person to be around. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    Pedestrians should walk into traffic, but riding a bike into traffic is extrememly dangerous. Either way, this whole thing is out of control.

    Post # 8
    Member
    4275 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @hidingmyface:  Euw yeah…I say good riddance! Time to find a friend that is more stable! :-/

    Post # 11
    Member
    4275 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @hidingmyface:  I am going to PM you.

    Post # 12
    Member
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    @hidingmyface:  The problem is that you are moving much faster than a 3 mph you might walk so if you are hit by a car, the two motions are opposed and the crash is therefor much more tramatic than if you were on foot. If a car hits you from behind, the motion is in the same direction so the force of impact is much lower.

    Plus, you’re a vehicle, so you are breaking the law (not just being unsafe) by riding against traffic. It’s like driving a car on the wrong side of the road.

    Post # 13
    Member
    8883 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    The lady is a total whackjob, but the whole situation sounds very immature and weird.

    I’m surprised nobody else has mentioned the age thing. IMO it’s very weird. I’m 28 and I would not hang out with a 61 year old, that seems really strange to me. Try spending time with friends in your age range, rather than a bitter old geezer who shoplifts.

    Post # 14
    Member
    2781 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @hidingmyface:  personally I think the whole thing is childish and immature. For starters throwing something in her face to get back at her for arguing with you is no different then what she did. You both stooped to the same level on this one.

    Post # 16
    Member
    3625 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    My Darling Husband has colleagues that are considered friends that are significantly older than us (similar to your situation) and they are a lot like your friend, minus the shoplifting (as far as we know). I attribute it to them being old and without a lot of other close family and friends (again, like your friend). I think as people age, they *tend* to be less flexible and understanding and become more fixed in their ways of thinking.

    With this in mind, it’s up to you if you want to keep calling her out on things she does wrong. Unfortunately, she won’t change. It’s like the crotchety old men you see in movies; they’re just like that. I’m glad you decided to stop talking to her. It’s unhealthy.

    The reason why she called you back and was all chipper is because deep down inside, she knows she’s lonely and you’re essentially one of the few people that will give her the time of day. Personally, I find this dependency kind of suffocating since it’s not a mutual give and take of fun and good times. Rather, you are spending your time together quarrelling.

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