(Closed) Wow…Just had a huge fight and I don’t quite understand!?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Maybe he’s afraid that your Boyfriend or Best Friend will run her mouth to Darling Husband and her husband will take it out on yours? 

Post # 4
Member
1237 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I’m confused – is he mad that you talked to her about it or about the reasons you’re not going? Either way, I would be pretty taken aback by his behavior – kicking over a chair and leaving sounds pretty serious.

Post # 6
Member
1267 posts
Bumble bee

I’m confused.  You told her that you guys are testing at school, that you don’t like the other girl and then another reason?  Was he mad at the other reason you don’t want to name or was he mad that you told her you didn’t like the girl?  Was the ‘tiny reason’ something that he doesn’t think is tiny?

Post # 7
Member
1237 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I see.. He’s probably more embarassed by his behavior than angry about the situation at this point. He probably agrees with you that it’s a slightly uncomfortable situation but that he overreacted. I would stop trying to contact him and just give him a little space, I’m sure he’ll come back soon.

Post # 9
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I can understand why he would be upset. If you guys had already agreed on the excuse that you were going to give, then I am sure he feels like you put him in a position to be called out as a liar. IMO, the fact that “they are both our friends and I knew they would understand” is not as important as the two of you presenting a united front. I am sure that you can understand that your Boyfriend or Best Friend probably told her husband the “real” reason that you guys aren’t going on the trip and now your Darling Husband is probably worried that his business partner and friend thinks he’s untrustworthy.

The way he handled that anger is not cool, but I can understand why he is angry b/c I would be giving my Fiance the cold shoulder right now if he had done what you did. My advice…apologize for your part in it while letting him know that his reaction was unacceptable.

Post # 11
Member
1267 posts
Bumble bee

@JaneyD:

I think you’ve got this.  You really figured out how he felt and saw where you might have had some responsibility.  Now when he cools down and you talk let him know that.  When things get a little more calm, let him know that his reaction really concerned you as stress and outbursts are unhealthy and go from there.  Good luck!  The holidays have a tendency to get everyone a bit oversensitive.

Post # 12
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@JaneyD: It happens to the best of us….I have been the “guilty” party a time or two and while Fiance didn’t kick over any chairs, he was pretty hurt and disappointed. We definitely had to discuss how we would handle sharing information with our friends. 

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