Post # 1
I am an attorney, but still getting used to all the formalized uses of "esquire".
Another girl in my office is getting married and plans to put on the invitations and save-the-dates:
Please join us for the marriage of:
I understand putting it on someone’s name when you address their invitation, but on your own invitation? Am I the only one that thinks this is a bit pretentious?
Post # 3
i’m an attorney and would find it a bit pretentious. but if you do want to add that sort of formality you have to make sure to extend it to your guess, which could become tons of work. Dr., PhD, etc.
Post # 4
i’m an attorney also and i think that’s a bit pretentious for me (actually a lot), but hey if it works for other people the most i can do is giggle a little bit.
Post # 5
I’m not an attorney, but I would find that pretentious if I received it in the mail! To me, that’s like me putting John Doe, PharmD on ours for my fiance’s doctor of pharmacy degree…lame-o!
Post # 6
My fiance and I are both lawyers and there is NO WAY we would put that on an invitation! Ha ha! Lawyers have such bad reps that we try to avoid telling people what we do! Just kidding! Maybe they’re both just really proud of that degree…or they really feel like it defines who they are as people. To each their own, but personally I’m still in denial that I’m a lawyer.
Post # 7
Okay, so apparantly I’m not the only one who feels this way. 🙂
Now for some advice – how do I gently tell her this without offending her?
Post # 8
Esquire on the invitations? Is that the rule? At my firm, we never use esquire, and I think it would be weird to do so on the invitations.
Post # 9
Wait, So it should be:
Mr. Chucky Cheese Esquire … …. ??? That’s how you address a lawyer? Hmm, never knew that.
I have some lawyers in the family and some invited, should I put that? I’ve never heard that in my life.
I know it is Dr. and Mrs. Chucky Cheese …. never heard of Esquire.
Post # 10
I’m not sure it’s your place to tell her. It’s her invitation and she can do what she wants. If it comes up in conversation or if she specially asks you, you could say something like "I’ve never seen that done before" or "Do you use the Esquire title a lot? It’s so formal." Or something that brings it up without sounding like you’re passing judgment. I don’t know…that’s a tough one.
Post # 11
Maybe you could steer her in the direction of this page!
Post # 12
I wouldn’t tell her not to do it, but also I wouldn’t use it on your own invitations.
Post # 13
I think it’s a teeny bit pretentious to have on an invitation, but I don’t know the best way to address this with your friend. I have seen people listed as "Doctor So-and-so" on invitations before and I guess this is technically correct as the legal equivalent. My sister is an attorney and I asked her–she also thought it was a little pretentious. I did address her invite to "Sister, Esquire" because I know she likes it. Although I do think it’s a bit different if you’re addressing something to someone and listing your own name on the invitation.
Post # 14
Oh my goodness… no, no, never, never!
Perhaps if she asks about how you are addressing your invites then you could throw it in there that you are omitting "Esq." due to your personal preference?
Haha my Fiance is a lawyer too & it sounds like its common for a lot of lawyers to be "anti-attorney". I understand that she is proud of her accomplishments, but I’m sure everyone who knows her already knows of her hard work & title!
Post # 15
I would maybe point out that it seems a bit strange to you, given that you rarely see invitations with things like August Bride, PhD or August Bride, MD. Putting it in perspective like that may help her make a more informed decision.
Post # 16
Well, I asked her about it, and it was a losing battle. She said this is what defines them and that she is very proud of that "distinction". Oh well. I tried to save her from the judgment of others. 🙂