(Closed) Writing your own secular ceremony

posted 8 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I looked at other bee’s weddings who wrote their own ceremonies. My biggest inspiration was Mrs Cherry Pie. I also went off of websites and my dad got married 2 years ago and had the packet of all the different things to put into a wedding ceremony. I would say start with a basic outline of how you want your ceremony to go. Figure out what readings you want as well. Then fill in the blanks.

Post # 4
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m writing my own too. I used this sample from about.com as kind of a starting point.


I haven’t been to a lot of weddings or anything so I don’t really know a lot of what needs to be in there anyway. Also, I’m considering doing the wine box thing where we nail the box shut, but neither of us really cares for wine…

Post # 5
198 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

The book The Wedding Ceremony Planner has been really helpful to me and I highly recommend it for writing your own ceremony.

Post # 6
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We’re in the same boat–my brother got ordained online to do our ceremony.  I second “The Wedding Ceremony Planner.”  We mixed and matched various wording from that book that worked for us.  And we personalized the greeting to make it more specific to our relationship (we used one of the “story” options).  

So, the intro, ring exchange, and pronouncement either came from or were inspired by the Wedding Ceremony Planner.  We each wrote our own vows.  And we picked our own readings.  Voila, ceremony!

Post # 7
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’ve looked at officiant websites, they usually include a handful of different ceremonies that you can get ideas from.

Post # 8
1820 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We are also writinng our own ceremony, but I did not use any online resources – mostly just “stole” ideas from weddings we have been to recently.  Here is what we are doing, if it helps!

  • processional
  • welcome speech and introduction of B&G by officiant 1
  • reading 1 (TBD)
  • introduction of officiant 2
  • B&G exchange of poems (B – “Pathagonia” by Kate Clanchy, G – TBD)
  • vows lead by officiant 2
  • ring exchange led by officiant 2
  • hand fasting led by officiant 2
  • reading 2 (“Oh the Places You’ll Go”)
  • wedding blessing (“Apache Blessing”) by officiant 3
  • declaration of marriage and kiss led by officiant 3
  • recessional

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