Post # 1
This has been a family battle for some time, but would it be wrong for a vegan to bring her own food to the reception… and possibily the rehersal dinner?
I’m vegan, and also highly allergic to milk. At my older brother’s wedding, I noted this on the RSVP card and was kindly given cheese filled pasta as a dish…. and then was promptly yelled at by both my mother and brother’s wife for not eating a $$$ dish. (No worries my other brother ate it).
Now my little brother is getting married. My mom has reminded me many times that I should make arrangements for my own food. My little brother’s fiance is trying to have me included, but the poor girl just seems to be out of her element in the planning thing and most caterers are like WTF is a vegan… (we are in the south).
Should I save her the trouble and just pack a bag of luna bars so every one can eat their steaks in peace?
Post # 3
If they do not have food for you to eat, then you need to bring your own.
Post # 4
I would bring my own food and have the caterer plate it. That way you won’t stand out. 🙂
Post # 5
Can your brother or his Fiance not contact the caterer and ask that a vegan meal be prepared for you?
You can’t be the only guest with dietary restrictions/allergies.
Post # 6
I am bringing my own food to my wedding lol. To answer your question, No, it’s not wrong at all. Just tell them so they don’t pay for a plate for you. I am vegan, gluten free, i don’t eat sugar or any other sweeteners or processed food. Needless to say, I bring my own food to everything including Thanksgiving, weddings, baby showers, family events etc. I don’t trust others to feed me, and the vendor will probably not have anything they can feed you anyway.
Post # 7
No, I don’t think its wrong. You shouldn’t just have to go without food. I’d try to keep it on the DL though, just so it doesn’t turn into a conversation piece or make the bride feel bad that she really can’t accomodate you. Maybe make an agreement with your brother to eat his salad/sides. in exchange for your entree.
Post # 8
@julies1949: Their catering selections are very limited due to the venue (preferred catering.. ugg) and one of the caterers didn’t even know what a vegan was.
@OctBride-2012: I was thinking along the same lines. I’ll suggest this and if the caterer throws a fit, I’ll just plate it myself and hand it to the waitstaff or something.
Post # 9
The bride should arrange to have a vegan-friendly meal prepared for you. Any venue worth its salt will do so, at an additional cost of course but they should be gracious hosts and provide that for you. You should not have to bring Luna bars to the dinner and nibble on them like a gerbil, poor thing. None of my friends are vegans but if they were and coming to my wedding, that is what I would do.
I’m very sorry that your mother has turned a blind eye and will not assist you in this. Maybe I’m jaded because I live in OC California where there are vegan places everywhere but I don’t think it’s that big of a deal to just ask a caterer to prepare something nice for you.
Post # 10
Couldn’t they just get you a pasta dish with marinara? I thought that most pasta was vegan.
Post # 11
I also have many allergies! Lactose, gluten, eggs, beef, garlic, often times eating out for me just isn’t an option unless I want to be hungry because theirs no food I can eat or very sick because someone’s contaminated my meal, if theycannot arrange for a meal designed for your dietary needs Bring your own! 😉
Post # 12
Being vegan must be tough in the south. Sadly you may have to bring your own food…I hope you aren’t traveling! That’d be so hard to not have the luxury of prepping your food at home.
I really don’t know what the problem is with caterers…how hard is it to put a dish together that is made with olive oil in tstead of butter, vegetable broth instead of chicken and just don’t top everything with cheese!
I don’t think there are any hardcore vegans coming to my wedding but still I hope my buffet vegetables and starches are vegan prepared then at least there will be options.
Post # 13
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I got married in the south and live in the south and maybe I’m just lucky to have spent the last 11 years in Gainesville, which is ahipster mecca smack dab in the middle of the deepest south in Florida, but vegan food is easy to find and at my wedding, our hotel had zero issues providing my brother with a vegan meal. In fact, we just made our third entree choice the vegan meal and I myself ate it along with 6 other guests (of 82). It’s the hosts’ responsibility, honestly, to properly host you; they should provide you a vegan meal and make sure it is actually vegan, especially since you are family, but even if you weren’t.
Many caterers and venues will not allow you to bring in outside food.
Post # 14
@OctBride-2012: I have many vegan friends who do this. Or, they figure out with the bride which side dishes will be edible for them and have a plate made up of those.
Post # 15
I always read that even if ONE person has a specific dietary requirement, then arrangements should be made. My brother-in-law doesn’t eat red meat, and there are a lot of diabetics in my family. Maybe your brother could tell the caterer what a vegan is!
Post # 16
Blah I’m sorry 🙁 It stinks that you even have to be asking this question, but I think that if you can’t get the caterer to understand what a vegan is it is perfectly fine for you to bring your own food! If anyone has a problem with it they are just silly!!