(Closed) WTH to do about my family????

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1844 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

  Man, that is quite a bomb to drop on you! I would give it a day or two, call your dad, and ask if you could talk to him. Tell him that what he said really had an impact on you, and you would like to sit down and talk about this further. From what you’ve told us, it sounds like there is some misunderstanding. If you feel yourself start to get worked up, walk away from the conversation.

  Good luck! I hope it all works out!

Post # 5
Member
1844 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@jpalm13:  I understand. I went through some problems with my Future Mother-In-Law. She wouldn’t talk to me, ignored me, but when she would see another one of FI’s friends come by, they would get the grand greeting. I did finally let my Fiance know, and he was able to sit down and talk things out with his mom. Things have definitely improved. I learned that, at the time, FI’s mom was worried that I would distract Fiance from school, which didn’t happen.

Who knows, maybe your dad was just in a bad mood that day. From my experience, the calmer you can be, the more likely your family will respect you and your SO. They will see that you two are a team, he is a good guy. Parents tend to worry about their kids and want the best for them.

Post # 6
Member
2261 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would find out why he said that… O.O Weird thing to say, honestly. Just be open and honest, it also sounds like no matter what he may say your SO is probably hardly to blame. :/ confusing. 

Post # 7
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Honestly, My father was very much the same way.

In his opinion, it wasn’t his “job” to impress any of his children’s significant others. If they were going to join the family one day, he felt it was up to THEM to start a conversation with him and prove that they were good enough for his kids.

It was quite intimidating for both me and any guy I brought home, but looking back at it, I really appreciate it and I think it helped me find a guy who had amazing manners and that truly cares about people.

Now I notice other people who are dating family members, and the men who don’t even do so much as stand up to greet a girl’s father really rub me the wrong way.

I’d talk to your SO about it. Maybe not say they don’t “like him,” but let him know what high expectations they have and that maybe he should make an effort to impress them.

My father would seriously sit in silence if a guy didn’t make an effort to start a conversation with him. He wanted to know that we were meeting and marrying strong people would be able to relate to and respect not only us, but also our family.

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