Post # 1
The other day my dad decides to drop a bomb on me….
Dad ‘doesnt like the way SO treats me and your mom’
WTF?! My SO is a quiet man of few words. Apparently, dad thinks SO makes a concious attempt to not talk to him and my mom that much and if I dont see it I’m blind.
…I was at a loss for words and just thanked him for the ride back to my car and left.
What should I do?
Post # 3
Man, that is quite a bomb to drop on you! I would give it a day or two, call your dad, and ask if you could talk to him. Tell him that what he said really had an impact on you, and you would like to sit down and talk about this further. From what you’ve told us, it sounds like there is some misunderstanding. If you feel yourself start to get worked up, walk away from the conversation.
Good luck! I hope it all works out!
Post # 4
@keepsmiling19: Thanks…It like really sucks because we keep talking about the ‘future life together’ stuff and engagement and wedding…We’ve been together for going on 2 years and he just now notices my SO doesn’t talk much? ARGH
Post # 5
@jpalm13: I understand. I went through some problems with my Future Mother-In-Law. She wouldn’t talk to me, ignored me, but when she would see another one of FI’s friends come by, they would get the grand greeting. I did finally let my Fiance know, and he was able to sit down and talk things out with his mom. Things have definitely improved. I learned that, at the time, FI’s mom was worried that I would distract Fiance from school, which didn’t happen.
Who knows, maybe your dad was just in a bad mood that day. From my experience, the calmer you can be, the more likely your family will respect you and your SO. They will see that you two are a team, he is a good guy. Parents tend to worry about their kids and want the best for them.
Post # 6
I would find out why he said that… O.O Weird thing to say, honestly. Just be open and honest, it also sounds like no matter what he may say your SO is probably hardly to blame. :/ confusing.
Post # 7
Honestly, My father was very much the same way.
In his opinion, it wasn’t his “job” to impress any of his children’s significant others. If they were going to join the family one day, he felt it was up to THEM to start a conversation with him and prove that they were good enough for his kids.
It was quite intimidating for both me and any guy I brought home, but looking back at it, I really appreciate it and I think it helped me find a guy who had amazing manners and that truly cares about people.
Now I notice other people who are dating family members, and the men who don’t even do so much as stand up to greet a girl’s father really rub me the wrong way.
I’d talk to your SO about it. Maybe not say they don’t “like him,” but let him know what high expectations they have and that maybe he should make an effort to impress them.
My father would seriously sit in silence if a guy didn’t make an effort to start a conversation with him. He wanted to know that we were meeting and marrying strong people would be able to relate to and respect not only us, but also our family.