WWYD – child care for a wedding

posted 12 months ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 17
Member
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

I also wouldn’t go.  I know that you say that’s not an option, but it seems like way too much of a hassle.  I would like to say make a family trip out of it and hire someone to go with you, but that seems like it would be really expensive, so I think if you insist on going, you should leave the toddler with grandparents.  The toddler is young enough that they won’t remember being left home.

Post # 18
Member
3607 posts
Sugar bee

Usually in these situations my husband or I go alone and the other stays with our son. It sucks, but it is what it is since we are not local to family and don’t really want to put the obligation on family members to watch our child. If you’re not willing to go alone then I would leave your toddler with family and find a sitter for the baby that’s local to the wedding. Seems like a whole lot of hassle for a wedding though.

Post # 19
Member
500 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Twizbe :  Totally.  We have two kids and ran into this issue earlier this spring with an Out of Town wedding.  We ended up taking our 3 month old (and ditching our 2 year old with my husband’s parents for the weekend) and then I pumped and the babysitter just bottlefed her while we were at the reception (we stopped back between the wedding and reception to check in).  As it turned out, everyone was just fine.  She spoke English- as we do, so I guess it wasn’t that much of an issue, but I would think that as long as your sitter knew the basics you’d be all set.  I’m always up for an adventure, and it sounds like you guys will have a spectacular time, whatever you decide!  Enjoy 🙂  

Post # 20
Member
6377 posts
Bee Keeper

I personally wouldn’t go, but since you are hell bent on going, I would do some research to find a babysitter who speaks english. Then take either one or both kids. Since you are taking a mini vacation, I lean towards both kids, but I get that it would be way easier if you just had the baby. 

I think bringing parents sounds too complicated, and with all their other issues (flying, missing a birthday, dog, etc) would be too much hassle. 

Post # 21
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee

Can you go to the wedding and have your husband stay back with the kids?

Post # 22
Member
2442 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: NJ

WWYD is in the header, so WIWD is not go. Why is it not an option, you don’t want to break your streak of attending weddings?

You have more energy than I do, and more tolerance and patience. Considering inconveniencing parents and in-laws over a destination wedding, for a bride who is not considerate enough to make an exception for you (exceptions are more needed in a destination wedding than a one-day in town one), I really want to hear more about why this is so important to you.

Post # 23
Member
1928 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Twizbe :  If you’re set on going, do what you want. This, “My preferred option is to leave oldest here and use the local baby sitter. Hubby doesn’t like it though as he doesn’t want oldest to miss out on a trip” – isn’t a valid reason. Your oldest will be too young to remember the trip. If anything, it’ll be more comfortable for him to miss the trip.

Post # 24
Member
9812 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I wouldn’t go.

Why can’t you all go (husband and kids) and only you attend the wedding?  Make a family vacation out of the rest of it.

Post # 25
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1995

I wouldn’t go.  That all sounds like a huge hassle.  Bringing kids and leaving them with a babysitter they don’t know or that speaks the same language sounds like a recipe for disaster.  6 months is when a baby starts to have stranger anxiety.  

You say you never do much to celebrate your parent’s anniversary, but 40 years is a pretty big one.  I wouldn’t leave a child at home with them when it’s their anniversary.  

If you weren’t nursing, I would say go alone since you are not wanting to break your track record of wedding attendance, but you can’t leave the baby home unless you want to pump for the weekend.  The other option would be all go, but your husband could watch the kids at the hotel.  

 

Post # 26
Member
972 posts
Busy bee

Twizbe :  I would leave both kids with my parents and go to wedding.

Post # 27
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1995

penny1403 :  That seems really selfish to me.  It’s the parent’s 40th wedding that weekend.  I don’t think I’d want to babysit 2 very young grandchildren on a milestone wedding anniversary so their parents can go to a destination wedding.  

Post # 28
Member
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Twizbe :  If she’s such a good friend, you should ask her if she’d make an exception with your kids. If not, she’s not being a good friend and I wouldn’t go

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