(Closed) WWYD: Your daughter gets pregnant at 11?? (Dr. Phil)

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 137
Member
1268 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 1994

Termination!

Post # 138
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

I got preggers at 15 and it was traumatic. I was a good kid, great grades, strict southern baptist christian upbringing and tried sex for the first time. It lasted all of 45 secs and 9 months later here comes a kid. 

It was the WORST experience I’ve had in 20 years. Imagine a 15 year old with swollen feet, hemmorrhoids, stretchmarks being called a slut and whore by people who didn’t even know me. It didn’t matter that I was on the honor roll. debate team and active in my church or that it was my FIRST time.  

But everyone was so busy advocating for the unborn baby that they never realized that they were sacrificing the 15 yr old kid who was still a kid, who just made a mistake. I was not ready to be a mother. I was emotionally stunted at age 15 for a very long time.

Fast Forward 20 years

Love, Forgiveness, Time, Maturity, Wisdom have all caught up with me  and now I can’t imagine life without him because he a major part of the person that I’ve become, and I adore him. This was not an easy journey and it is not a journey  I would travel again. 

So to answer your original question if that was my daughter and we found out she was preggers at age 11. I would NOT sacrifice my daughter, we’re terminating, getting birth control ( IUD, ,depo), family counseling,  work towards forgiveness and rebuilding trust.

 

 

 

 

Post # 140
Member
2358 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

@megz06:  I know this is kind of an old topic, but, to be fair, when I was growing up my 3 best friends were all boys.  When I was 11, one was 12, one was 13, and the other was 14.  I didn’t have sex til I was in college, but my mom certainly never thought twice about not following us around when we were hanging out in the neighborhood.

 

Post # 141
Member
3941 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would give my daughter two options :  1. abortion or 2. adoption.

She wouldn’t have the option to keep the baby but I wouldn’t force her to have an abortion. 

Post # 142
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Taking your child on the Dr. Phil show after she’s already been through so much is only further traumatizing her.  This family needs the support of a real psychologist in a private, safe and confidential setting – not national television.  I would put my daughter in sexual abuse counselling as well and get a paternity test – most 11 year olds do not consent to sex unless they’ve been exposed to it very early through sexual abuse.  I would worry that the 13 year old boy forced her into something she wasn’t comfortable with or that someone else is abusing her and is the real father.  

Post # 143
Member
956 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I would strongly encourage her to end the pregnancy, but I don’t think I could force her if she didn’t want to. I know the complications and such, but the resentment she would have after someone else forced her to end the pregnancy would be bad. She may go out and try to get pregnant again just to have a baby.

I would then have my daughter sent to an all girls boarding school.

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