(Closed) XP: kids in wedding party

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
4005 posts
Honey bee

What are the age ranges of the kids?

We were at a wedding where a friend had all of her nieces and nephews in the wedding, and there were something like 6 or 7. They put them all in 2 wagons, and had the older kids wheel them down the aisle. I thought it was so adorable! If you want your daughter to specifically stand out, she can walk by herself so she feels more special. 

Post # 5
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We only have 2 adults in our entourage: my Maid/Matron of Honor and his bestman.

My 2 nieces + my 2 nephews + his 2 sons + his 1 daughter = 3 junior bridesmaids (ages 10,10,13) + 3 junior groomsmen (ages 11,14,17) + 1 ring bearer (age 3)

I’m only 4’11”, so except for 2, everyone in the bridal party is taller than me. Hence, no flower girl.

I’m Asian. Groom’s Caucasian. And it turnd out that the rest of the bridal party will be matched similarly… so it’ll be visually interesting.

Thank goodness, I only have 4 nieces and nephews. And with his 3 kids, the numbers and ages match well. We did have people volunteering their kids and such. Haha.  

We are assigning the kids to help man the photobooth, help people find their names in the seating chart, and get people to sign our wish tree. We don’t really expect a lot of help from them, but we’d like them to be involved.

Oh and apart from the wedding party, we are keeping our event strictly adults.


Post # 6
30390 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think it’s possible to go overboard trying to find a place for every relative in the wedding party. Someone has to be a guest!

I would just have your daughter as flower girl. Why not make her feel extra special as you become a family?


Post # 7
7 posts

Have you considered having your groom honor your daughter during the ceremony by making a vow to her and then giving her a necklace or something similar to help her remember it? I have done that at a number of weddings and it is very meaningful, both to the child and the groom. At a wedding last summer, the groom actually dropped to his knees and asked the child if she would have him as her father. Everyone was in tears.

As for the nieces and nephews, I wouldn’t worry about trying to incorporate them all into the wedding. Let them be guests along with their parents.

Post # 8
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I understand where you’re coming from. My husband has not expressed any need to make his kids feel special. On the other hand, because I am the youngest and only daughter of the family, it is an expectation to have my nieces and nephews in the bridal party.

So I suggested to my husband that we should have a unity sand ceremony with his kids i.e. the 3 kids, him and I will each hold a different colour of sand. We will take turns pouring them into a glass jar. It’ll be a nice way to symbolize the kids as being part of our marriage. It’ll single them out of the whole bridal party. And it’ll make a wonderful momento. My husband thinks it’s a pretty cool idea. 🙂

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