Post # 1
Did any other Jewish Bees have a Yahrzeit candle at your ceremony? Did you use a regular yahrzeit candle or something else?
Both of our father’s had passed. We want to acknowledge them during the ceremony and our rabbi suggested lighting the Yahrzeit and saying a prayer.
I know they burn for 24 hours and aren’t very pretty. I didn’t know if I should use it anyway and have someone blow it out at the end, or use a shorter burning candle in a votive holder. Would it make a difference?
Post # 3
Have you thought about lighting regular candles instead? The traditional yahrzeit candle is only lit on specific occasions — the anniversary of the loved one’s death, Yom Kippur, and a few other Jewish holidays. I’ve never heard of lighting one at a wedding. As you’ve noted, they are quite plain and unattractive (with those big white and blue stickers on the glass), and you’re supposed to let it burn itself out, which takes around 24 hours.
Since a wedding is not a traditional yahrzeit occasion, do you need to feel bound by tradition? You might talk with your rabbi about it. A remembrance candle and prayer is a lovely idea, but perhaps something more attractive than a yahrzeit candle would be nicer for the occasion, plus you won’t feel bad about blowing it out after the ceremony.