Yelled at his Ex

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 16
Member
11974 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

She sounds otherwise unbalanced, but if her living situation changes she has the right to go back to court for a change in circumstances. And if the holiday is her weekend you can insist on keeping it that way or switching. 

Why are you dealing with this? 

Post # 18
Hostess
9615 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

Why would you continue to let the kids stay with her if she’s mentally unstable and self-harming? Why isn’t your Darling Husband pushing for full custody? Why would you want the kids to spend 50% of their time in a highly volatile and unstable environment (certainly unstable if she’s been married twice in 1 year). 

Post # 19
Member
11744 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Yeah have to agree with 

FutureDrAtkins :  and 

weddingmaven :  

the kids shouldn’t be with her if he has proof that she is incapable of parenting right now. And why are you hand,in this? 

 it won’t be helping matters for you to be involved. That will only escalate things.  I would leave this to your husband. 

 

Post # 22
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I understand.

Similar but different situation. Ex wife is a narcissist and lives in her own world. She has screwed up each of the 3 kids, in a variety of ways. The first two have lived with us and now the 3rd one wants to. She is a piece of work. I will leave it at that….

She signed daughter 2 over to us before court because we saved every letter and email sent (DH and ex would communicate via text and email), and it painted quite a story. Her lawyer got it from our lawyer and I assume told her the judge would laugh her out of court. At the time they had joint legal custody and she did not involve him in anything, she was in complete violation of her agreement. Everything was very clear reading all the texts and emails in chronological order. 

I say communicate via text and email, save them all. Document. 50% custody means half the time, not just when you are bored. It sounds like she has some medical issues. I don’t know how and if that is considered or handled by the courts in these decisions, as that gets tricky. All you can do is show her history with the kids, and “intent” based on things she says. I don’t know how old the kids are but in our case we had to get D2 her own lawyer, a guardian at litem who met with the daughter and reviewed everything independently and made a recommendation.

As much as it sucks, it’s ultimately the kids who suffer the most. I’m sorry you all have to go through this.

Post # 24
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

jannigirl :  oh yeah, she is going to pull some stuff with the kids that will stun you. I am still stunned. Some people are master manipulators and those of us who aren’t will never understand. My advice with the kids is to stay consistent and not get pulled into any of it. Remember you can only do what you can do and moving so the kids can see this woman (who moved away!), is way beyond the call of duty. His last one is 16. When he turns 18 I am having a huge party. I’m sorry you have to go through this. 

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