(Closed) Yes, Another Whiny Bachelor Party Post

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
391 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

It’s understandable tofeel that way and I made it clear to my fiance that I wouldn’t stand for that at all. He’s been honest with me about what goes on at those things and we made a mutual agreement that that wouldn’t ever happen.We are having a party together.


If he has friends who would do that, regardless of his feelings, then those aren’t good friends.


I dont believe in such things. I believe that if a guy or girl need to celebrate their marriage by acting out like that, then they shouldn’t be getting married.

Strippers and escorts are a no no.

I’m sorry that you are going through that. Just try to have trust that he isn’t doing that.

I dont know if I helped or made things worse by saying what i did, but that is a sore spot for me as well.

Post # 5
391 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

๐Ÿ™ I wish I could give you a hug. Why aren’t you out having fun, too?


Post # 6
2607 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I just don’t get why it’s ok for guys to go out and pretty much act like they are single as a way to celebrate getting married yet if a their future wife were to behave the same way it would be considered inappropriate. 

It’s NOT okay, at least not for me OR my Darling Husband.  Each couple has the right to decide what is right for them, but for us, that’s not the way you celebrate your upcoming marriage vows.  Get that sh** out of the way while you’re SINGLE, if you must do it, but that doesn’t fly when you are supposed to be in a committed relationship with someone you love.

Post # 9
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I had the same conversation with my Fiance last night…. I said that I trust him, but not a couple of his scumbag friends.  (I actually said that – there are like 2 of them that I am not so crazy about because of the stories I hear about them from FI!)  He was shocked that I said that, but umm hello – he tells me about the things that they do – what does he expect! 

There’s nothing I can say to make you feel better, but you just have to trust that your fiance wouldn’t do anything stupid…. after all, he asked you to marry him – so why would he want to jeopardize that, ya know?  If he’s mature enough to be ready to settle down and get married, he’s probably mature enough to behave himself, even if he’s intoxicated and surrounded by scumbag friends (lol – my words, not yours!)  ๐Ÿ™‚ 

Post # 11
662 posts
Busy bee

I think when we get there my SO and I will have the opposite problem haha.  His friends are decent and he doesn’t like strip clubs.  Half of my friends, on the other hand, are wild.  I think he’ll be the one at home worrying all night ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 12
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Ugg.. I can imagine what you must be going through, and I’m sending a hug.  I know what that wondering feels like, and it isn’t fun.

I actually was talking about this whole thing a month ago with my SO, and told him I did not want him doing anything like that at his Bachelor Party, and in exchange, i would go with him to a strip club (before his guys only party).  That way, I can see exactly what is going down.  He LOVED the idea of me going… plus he gets to brag to the guys that his girlfriend went with him.  A great reason why he doesn’t need to go, if they try and pressure him.

Post # 14
915 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

That’s so sweet he texted you that, his filling you in so you don’t have to let your imagination run wild. I think your concerns are very valid but I am sure it will be fine. You will feel so much better when he gets home. My Fiance just got back from a Bach party last weekend and I was worried too, he called me regualrly and let me know what they were up to so I felt a lot better. 


Post # 15
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My Fiance was on his guys weekend, too! He texted me something like 45 times yesterday: just little notes, observations, and pictures of the city they’re in. I think some bachelor parties get out of hand, it’s true. But a lot of these, the guys want so badly for it to be something EPIC, and AWESOME, and DANGEROUS, like something from the movies … but  mostly it’s just a bunch of guys hanging around trying to enjoy themselves while they miss us.

Post # 16
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

oh, i TOTALLY feel you.

Fiance went to a friend’s bachelor party last weekend and they went to the strip club. everyone was getting lap dances, and half of his friends are engaged/married too, so he figured he should (could?) do it too. he paid $40 for 2 songs in a private room. (apparently they didn’t do them on the main floor so everyone had to be in a private room. there were no doors on these rooms so i trust him that what he said was all that happened). i completely freaked out when he told me.

it doesn’t help that he has been in alabama for a month for work and for his only weekend off he went to this bachelor party, so i haven’t seen him in a long time. i just can’t help but think that he’d much rather be with someone super hot and whatever like one of those strippers. i’m not built like that and i can’t move like that, and it just makes me depressed to think about. i’ve told him how upset i am. i couldn’t sleep or eat for a few days because the thought just made me nauseous. he is still in alabama so i still haven’t seen him yet. i’m just terrified that the next time we are together he will be thinking about that girl or any of the other strippers.

he has assured me and apologized a ton, to the point where he said he felt ashamed and whatever. i feel bad being so upset because i usually just don’t let things bother me. i used to think i didn’t care about strip clubs and that’s why i didn’t mind him going in the first place. i think he thought they were as gross as i think they are, so he didn’t really enjoy it. he can’t tell me he didn’t enjoy it though when he decided to pay for it.

i’m still trying to get over it, but i know that he will go to a strip club for his bachelor party, and his friends will probably buy him dances, and it just makes me sick. i can’t tell him no though because i don’t want to be making rules for his bachelor party. he knows he would feel the way i do if i were to dance like a stripper on some random guy, and i agree that it’s so not cool for it to be “just a guy thing” to go to strip clubs. it SHOULD NOT be acceptable.

wow, sorry for the huge rant. i just have no one really to talk to about this.

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