Post # 1
Please tell me other bees get slightly annoyed when you ask your family or Bridal Party for their opinion on something only to have them respond with, “Well, it’s your wedding, do what you want”.
YES! I KNOW IT’S MY WEDDING AND I WILL DO WHAT WORKS BEST FOR ME AND MY Fiance BUT I JUST WANT TO GET YOUR OPINION!
Ugghhghg, I know they have no bad intentions but sometimes I just want a handful of opinions so that I know I’m making the best choice. I am fully aware that it’s ultimatly up to me and my Fiance, but I just want to know what you think, regardless of if I agree or not =0
Sorry, that’s my vent for the night =)
Post # 3
To me, that is the most aggravating passive-aggressive response ever. Most of the time it means, “Well, it’s your wedding and if you want to muck it up with total crap, then that is your bizness.” I don’t know if that is what your mom means, but that is what I interpreted from my wedding. Anywayz, be glad you are not bombarded with too many opinions. If ever in doubt, look to your friends at the bee. We are here to help 🙂
Post # 4
Yeah, I’m right at 2 months out and still don’t have many people (BP or family) that ask me much about the wedding. Which is fine, I know it’s not their top priority. So when I call to get their opinion and they say that, I take it more as, “I really just don’t care”. And I know too, that’s not how they mean it. It’s just how I take it. I think they are worried that if I take their advice and don’t like it, that I’ll blame it on them! lol. I agree though, the Bee is a great place to get opinions! The poll questions have definitely helped a bunch when I just want to see what a variety of people say.
Post # 5
I feel this a damned if you do and damned if you don’t situation. Just look at all the posts on here about brides upset when someone gives their opinion!
Post # 7
My friend essentially only asks me (her MOH) and her Fiance for our opinions. I give her mine freely as does her Fiance. Perhaps limiting it to 1 other person outside you and your Fiance that has shown/expressed interest will get you the response you’re looking for? I can see people not wanting to wedding plan for an entire year. Plus, as a PP mentioned, if they give you their opinion and it’s not what you like it’s just not good, usually.
Post # 8
I save “it’s your wedding” for those instances when the bride has asked my opinion, I give it honestly and kindly, and she begins to rebut with reasons why I should change my mind….I understand your frustration, but perhaps the people saying this to you have grown tired of trying to say what you want to hear.
Post # 9
@Terryal87: I 100% agree with you! I hate that saying!!! I’ve heard it 10 times in the past 3 days!
Post # 10
- Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World
I usually ask my mom and BMs for their opinion (and FH of course!). They will freely tell me what they think and then end it with “it’s your wedding, if you want that, then do it”. The most current example of this is Bridesmaid or Best Man dress decisions…we have 3 favorites and they all have varying opinions but they all tell me that they will gladly wear whatever dress I select. 🙂
Post # 11
@Terryal87: TOTALLY understand your vent!
I didn’t really ask much of my BMs throughout the planning process, but whenever I asked this one particular Bridesmaid or Best Man ANY question, she would ALWAYS respond with “do whatever you want!” I already know it’s my wedding! And I will do what I want, but sometimes I just need an outside opinion!
Post # 12
@Terryal87: I totally agree with the “I don’t care” meaning.
I guess I just realized a while back that no one cares as much about the wedding as the bride. If every single person that ever said, “it’s your wedding, do what you want” annoyed me, I’d be ripping my hair out by now.
Post # 13
I can see how that would get frustrating!
However, I can imagine saying ‘its your wedding, you do what you think best’ after giving my opinion so that my friend wouldnt think I’d be offended if she stuck with her opinion and not mine. x