Post # 1
just wanted to vent. My name is tulip and i am anorexia. now. i am so sick of people being so judgemental. i really do.
i have been battling this disease since i was 10. im not going to blame anyone for this but me, but i did grow up in a rough household…
my husband on the other hand is perfect. and itallian, and so is his ENTIRE family (except his sister lol ) and i am always judged by them. they dont even know and they judge.
im so sick of people trying to tell me or others that im a brat because i want to be skinny and all this. SHUT THE HELL UP. its a freakin disease. not eating is just a sympton. the disease is distorted image of yourself and how you feel inside about you. im so sick of it. if any of you lovely bees come accross anyone who is suffering from anorexia or bullemia or any other eating disorder, please dont pull a “why dont u just eat?” or whatever. please be understanding because having this disorder/disease whatever you want to call it is very very hard…people like me are suffering inside so badly and no one understands that its not us being brats. its us fighting ourselves to stay healthy…
just please be understanding towards others like me…
Post # 3
Anorexia and other eating disorders are badly understood by many and so difficult to live with. I witnessed the debilitating effects of bulemia in college with a close friend, and it was so hard not only to watch her go through it but once people found out the way they talked about her behind her back and even to her face… horrible.
I’m sorry your family can’t be more understanding or supportive. I hope your husband is, and I truly hope you’re getting help from an outside source – a support group, a therapist, etc. – but I also know that even if you are, anorexia is a lifetime thing. I think people don’t get that with mental disorders – they think if you just do a couple of therapy sessions or take medication it’ll all go away in an instant and you won’t have any more problems. They don’t see that you learn to live with it and take measures to deal with it, rather than “make it go away”.
Try not to let their judgements effect you. I know it’s going to hurt because it always does when people blame you for something you can’t help or try to make you feel foolish for something serious, but you have to focus on you, on recovery and on the life you’re building with your husband.
Post # 4
PS – It might help if your in-laws knew more about anorexia to understand what you’re going through. I found a couple of books on Amazon, maybe if you gave them one or two to read they could open their eyes to what you’re going through and see what’s really happening? Just a thought.
Post # 5
@MissCalifornia: oh they know tons :0 thanks. my Darling Husband spoike to them once about a frined of our that had anorexia and they just REFUSE to understand. ugh. they cant grasp the idea that not everyone feels comfrtable stuffing their face with 10 pounds of pasta. :p they know about the disease..and i think lots of ppl do but just choose to ignore that its exactly that- a disease.
Post # 6
@MissCalifornia: i appreciate your kind words. thank you so much. 🙂 i wish more ppl were understanding like u 🙂
Post # 7
I had major eating issues when I was in high school and college and even sought treatment for disordered eating so I know how you feel. I am also living proof that you can really get over this and move on with your life and live and eat very normally.
That being said, it’s amazing how little people really understand about these disorders. I remember losing 21lbs in about 3 weeks and my parents never said anything about it. I also remember being 20 years old and having legit temper tantrums if my dad would make me an egg white omelet with butter versus cooking spray, and they never said anything about it. They lived with me and they didn’t even see it or understand it was a problem. Unfortunately, people just won’t get it.
That being said, please consider getting professional help if you haven’t already…I promise things can get better from here!
Post # 8
Are you receiving any treatment for your disorder? I ask out of concern for your safety and well being, not to be rude.
People who do not understand eating disorders can be very rude and hurtful. I struggled with a lot of ignorance before I agreed to go to treatment.
I hope you’re safe and healthy on your wedding day- you deserve it.
Post # 9
Wow, I hope you just take care of yourself. Your inlaws should learn to keep their mouth shuts. As I’m sure you know, living with someone with that diease isn’t easy, and sometimes people don’t know how to react.
Post # 10
its sad that you say “I am anorexia” . your so much more than the illness. help is possible and even though it seems impossible you can get better. ((hugs))
Post # 11
You really need to get treatment. I’m on the road to recovery, but only because I’m in treatment. You need to take care of yourself for your husband, if not yourself. Please?
I agree about the insensitivity of others, but remember, they can’t understand. This kind of thing, people just cannot understand unless they’ve been through it. It’s true they frequently make insensitive comments, but it’s typically not intentional. Hang in there! xoxo
Post # 12
Sorry! People can be so judgemental. I struggled with bulemia for almost a decade and can understand part of your frustration. My parents threw me into treatment and although they tried, never really did understand. I can honestly say treatment didn’t do a thing for me until I was ready to make a change, and that took some time. IMO eating disorders are not just about a distorted image of yourself, but a feeling of a lack of control over your life (whether related to childhood events or otherwise). Personally, I made absolutely no progress until I realized WHY I was doing this to myself. It was literally the only thing I felt in control of when I felt like everything else was spinning out of control. Anyways, sorry for the epistle. The point is, take heart that there are many bees who understand what you’re going through and try your best to ignore all of the judging from the in-laws. If you ever decide to seek help, know that there will be bees here that will support you in that as well.
Post # 13
Agreed! Although I have never had an eating disorder I do have the occasional bout with clinical depression that I have to be on medication for. I hate when people tell me to “just cheer up” or “you need to exercise and eat right”. Uh, thanks. Not helpful. What’s worst though is when people walk around on eggshells around you because they don’t want to make you “worse”. It’s a chemical imbalance, sure you can stress me out but treating me like a delicate flower isn’t any better.
You are awesome, don’t let anyone tell you any different!
Post # 14
I know how you feel. When I was in my late teens I got my official diagnosis of anorexia nervosa. I’ve been struggling ever since.
Don’t let people who don’t understand dysmorphia get you down, and PLEASE seek treatment if you’re not already. I’ve been “recovered” for 6 years and still struggle…I definitely wouldn’t be even halfway to where I am now had it not been for therapy.
I hope you improve. Going through life hating yourself is so painful.