(Closed) Yet another mom-and-I-disagree-about-the-wedding post…

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I like your idea. Maybe add some pub tables for the older guests that dont want to walk around but I really love the idea of all the stations.

Post # 4
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think you can fill up three hours with a short cocktail hour, dinner, and cake cutting as long as it’s spaced a little bit and I think it’ll still be special if you still cut the cake, do some toasts, and enjoy time with your guests.

Post # 5
14494 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Cocktail party sounds awesome.  I have been to several wedding cocktail parties and they were wonderful.

Post # 6
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think your cocktail party sounds like a great idea and perfectly fitting for the amount of time you have. It’s your wedding, you need to do what works best for you (and your Fiance of course haha)

Post # 7
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

Most receptions are usually only 4 hours anyway,so yours won’t be much shorter. Will you provide tables and seating for all guests?

We had what was supposed to be a cocktail reception in May, and honestly? It was really not what I expected. We had passed hot & cold hor d’oerves, a seafood buffet,mashed potato bar,family style antipasto and bread per table, and meat carving & pasta stations, a salad bar and a dessert & coffee bar plus cake…..if people weren’t dancing they pretty much either went outside on the deck and mingled or sat at their tables. Not much different than any other reception dinner(except it cost more). Most of the guests were friends of the bride and groom, but it really wasn’t much different. I wish we’d just done a dinner too.

This is just my opinion, so you may want to think about your options before getting too upset. I’m sure you’ll work it out.

Post # 8
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

You could always set up tables for the older guest…. if they don’t mingle and move around, no big deal! Tell them it’s a “buffet” – but there are several they can choose from. I think things get lost in translation between generations.

I think you idea is perfect! Stick with it! Just figure out what your Mom’s specific concern is with the older guests and address it somehow.

Post # 9
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I love the idea of a cocktail reception! Hang in there, I’m super close with my mom (and super alike) too but wedding planning (and catering especially) has definitely caused some tension.

Post # 10
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I love your idea of a cocktail reception with food stations!

Maybe a way to balance your mom’s concerns would be to have plenty of seating so that older guests would be comfortable (i’m sure you’ve already thought of that, but just reinforce the idea with mom) and have a waiter focus on those guests in lieu of passing an appetizer. Still have passed apps, but have 1 person dedicated to people at tables to make sure they are all set.

Post # 12
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Sounds great!  That’s what we’re doing, minus the cake cutting or many toasts, so I’m partial to the cocktail party plan.

There can be resistance from folks who want something more traditional or a sit down dinner, or who think that there needs to be seating for everyone…but it’s only 3 hours, so I think that you’ll be more then fine.  I would explain what it is you envision and then ask where she sees the gaps or issues.  At least that way, you’re dealing with her concerns head on.

Post # 13
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think your idea of mingling with cute places to sit and munch on stuff sounds so fun! 3 hours is a fantastic time frame for that, and I’m sure once you express exactly what you mean to your mother, she’ll be right on board with you.

Post # 14
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Stations force people to get up and move around… which  leads to mingling. I think this is a great idea and that it will work out just great. Like you mentioned, alcohol always helps that too! 🙂

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