(Closed) Yet another RSVP complaint…

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
881 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@chercee:  TELL ME ABOUT IT! Just wait til you have to start emailing and calling people and they still refuse to answer.  I have texted this one chick a couple times and it’s like she has evaporated off the face of the earth.  I wonder if people are afraid to hurt my feelings by saying they aren’t coming.  Ridiculous.  I want to call everyone and say, “If you aren’t coming, that’s fine, I just need you to say so.  I don’t need an excuse and my feelings aren’t hurt.  I just want a f-ing head count!!!!”  I will be absolutely furious if these people dare show their rude faces at my wedding if they continue to ignore me.

ETA: and wow, I sound like a spoiled child.

 

Post # 18
Member
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

People don’t get it unless they’re getting married, or if they didn’t have a formal wedding. When my bff got married (I was MOH) I remember asking if I actually had to RSVP. She was like, yes!

Post # 19
Member
1227 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
@Bubbles42:  I actually gave my future step daughter (20) and future step son (18) invitations and reply cards and let them know that I expected them to fill them out and mail them to us. In the next 5 to 10 years they will both likely get invited to a ton of weddings and I think it’s important for them to understand the importance of RSVPing now so they aren’t causing others grief when they can’t be bothered to RSVP. 

Post # 20
Member
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

View original reply
@Bubbles42:  we just had a friend ask us the same thing. Her husband is the best man, and she messaged Fiance on Facebook and said, “Do I really need to send this RSVP back?” Fiance said, “Well, we did put a nice stamp on it for you, so yes, mailing it back would be nice.” Love that man 🙂 People just don’t seem to understand how important an official head count is!

Post # 21
Member
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

View original reply
@HeyKaraoke:  Oh good man! Fiance would be like, of course not! AND he’d probably forget to tell me until I complained about it.

Post # 22
Member
1709 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

@chercee:  Most definitely!  Especially if you did half the work and put a stamp on the damn thing for them!

Post # 23
Member
9129 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@chercee:  I would playfully respond: Hey, don’t waste that stamp!

Post # 24
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I have to admit before we started planning our wedding I was one of those people. Yes, yes I know! Those terrible people! Now that I look back I can only chock it up to the busyness of life and never having planned an event before. I just never took the time to sit down and think about the fact that caterers need final numbers and venues have seating limits and then the freaking seating plans. Honestly, I have actually emailed a few people since the planning process started to apologize about past behaviour. I would send in my RSVP on time (or phone them) but usually by the last possible day…or three days after.

So now that we’re planning our wedding and the RSVP date is two weeks away, we have a 10% response rate. So…RSVP karma for me, lol. I deserve it so I just laugh.l

Anyways, I just thought I’d give the perspective of the typical guest who really does love you and wants to come to your wedding but stupidly assumes you know they want to come…somehow. I think for 95% of the people, it’s not that they’re out to make your life worse, they’re just not thinking, or maybe thought they already responded. Who knows?

Post # 25
Member
782 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

IDEA: Put on your invitation:

“If you do not RSVP, please bring a chair and a sandwich.”

Then also say this to people in person.

That would frustrate me to no end hahaha

Post # 26
Member
487 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
@Brittanyg20:  Oh, that’s hilarious!  I wish I’d thought of that.

Post # 27
Member
296 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I agree!  At this end point the stress is on.  We planned on a small wedding and now it seems half the people are not comming.  All this work and money for people to not respond.  I am feeling down. 

Post # 28
Member
695 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@chercee:  +100. 

I’ve done my follow-ups to the non-responders, and one of my friends said that she’s coming and that she’d be dropping hers in the mail. This was over two weeks ago, and I haven’t seen it yet. One of my nieces hasn’t even responded to my Facebook message following up, even though she’s been on Facebook posting about stupid s***. Others have given us verbal yesses, which is okay, I suppose.

WTF is wrong with people, though? I made it so easy for them to send them back by pre-addressing and stamping the envelopes.

Post # 30
Member
1117 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We had a whole bunch of people tell us they were coming who didn’t show up. And a family who rsvpd the NIGHT BEFORE. We just used emails for rsvps, and this woman started hers saying “I hope you have internet at the venue”. Well we really didn’t. People can be stupid, I’m just glad we weren’t paying per person.

Post # 31
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

View original reply
@chercee:  You’re totally right about people wanting to have the flexibility to back out at the last minute. I see it all the time when I organize a dinner party or a gathering of people in a restaurant and I need to reserve. It is unbelievable how people will say “Oh Friday? Mmm sure, maybe we’ll drop by with one or two or four people, I’m not sure  (in a busy restaurant on a Friday after work when everyone goes out)”. Geeez I just want yes or no, and reserve a table (which I mention), and I still get those evasive answers. So now I don’t bother anymore, and go out with Fiance only, or with a few people I know will give me a yes or no answer. Seriously!!! And this behaviour is unforgivable in the case of a wedding where a lot of money is being spent on each guest!

The topic ‘Yet another RSVP complaint…’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors