(Closed) Yet another Vent. So tired of it all.

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Eh…let her do what she wants. I guarantee that people will be eating the homemade cake over the store bought cake anyway! Just do your thing, and let her do hers…

Post # 4
Member
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Does she keep mentioning Costco because she doesn’t like your baking or something?  Maybe there is something else going on there…

Post # 7
Member
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Could you change your flavor, if it bothers you that much?  Otherwise, whatever.  Let her make whatever she wants.  I would be annoyed but I would also try not to let it bother me too much.  Why are sister in laws so weird??

Post # 9
Member
3769 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

It’s extremely rude of your SIL to tell your Aunty to just buy the cake from CostCo!  I’d let the cake pop stand go though… whether her intentions are good and she wants to contribute, or she’s just trying her darndest to prove she’s as good as you at baking, I’m pretty sure your cake and cupcakes are going to be better and more impressive.  The guests probably won’t mind either.

Post # 10
Member
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Maybe she feels she needs to compete with you and she doesn’t have the talent to make a cake so she is discouraging you from doing it because she doesn’t want to look poorly? (This is the only thing I could come up with as to why she would care.)

Post # 13
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

@Cash000: Sorry…I guess I don’t know what a cake pop display is? 

Post # 15
Member
900 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I know this seems like it has everything to do with you, but I *guarantee* that this is just because your SIL is just the type that needs to control everything.  You are being vague and not telling her exactly what the design of the cake will be, and she’s probably worried that the cake won’t look good (having not seen your baking before) and will make her grandparents’ anniversary a disaster.  A cake from costco she can control (or return, or have them make another if they don’t follow directions).  A cake from you, she can’t control.

 

That’s really hard for some people. I have a similar Future Sister-In-Law, who is *super sweet* and always offering to help us with wedidng planning, but if I do allow her to help, it ends up like a lot of these situations that you’re having here.  And I’ve realized that’s just because that’s how SHE is, with everyone, it has nothing to do with me.  For example, my brother works in theater for a living.  He does stage design professionally (it’s one of 2 jobs he does, but he gets paid to do this), and as a wedding gift, he offered to use his sources to make a large chuppah-like arch for our ceremony.  Well…for some reason, this really freaked Future Sister-In-Law and Future In-Laws out, because they couldn’t see pictures ahead of time, since he will be making it from scratch.  Like, they kept saying over and over, let’s just rent one.  So we can see it.  And I was like, no…it’ll be free for us if my brother does it, and he has REALLY good taste, and he makes things like this FOR A LIVING, and he has connections to all kinds of materials and labor that we wouldn’t normally have, and still…I could tell that they wanted me to just rent one that they could preapprove.

But I stood my ground.  nicely.  =)  And I know they are going to be very pleased when they see the final product.

So, just make sure you make the most professional looking cake of all time—make sure it looks better than a Costo cake, both in terms of design and taste—and then she’ll learn she can “trust” your baking.

It’ll be fine.  I think these are the types of kinks that have to be figured out when someone new comes into the family. Until she sees your baking skills with her own eyes, she’s not gonna believe it.

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