(Closed) You get one day……(all bees need to read)

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 62
Member
1147 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

on the   ‘you only get one day’   remark,  as i read that i took it to mean dont let things get you down,  dont let things ruin that ONE day that is coming……was i wrong? 

Post # 63
Member
3189 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Great job showing how negative and rude *other* people can be. If you didn’t want to offend anyone you wouldn’t have started a post that is so obviously going to start drama.

Weddingbee isn’t simply a support forum, it’s also for advice – and you know what? Sometimes brides get so wrapped up in their wedding plans that they make mountains out of molehills, and they need a reality check to come back down to earth and see that it might not be that big of a deal. And it’s not your place to tell anyone they can’t do that. It’s a public forum, and as long as we aren’t breaking any rules we do not have to agree with other posters.

Oh, and yes, you DO only get one day. It’s a very true statement – that’s why people say it. Stating the truth doesn’t mean I’m not treating them like a human being, exxaggerate much?

 

 

Post # 65
Member
277 posts
Helper bee

@futuremrsny:  I personally think, And a little note to all your distressed bees: keep your head held high, let the negative comments roll off your back, and remeber one day all of this stressful stuff will make a great funny story to tell your future kids. Lots of love to all of you girls and keep fighting the good fight!!!” would have been enough said, but it’s nice that you are supporting others and standing up for them.

Post # 67
Member
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I love you British girls (“cockers”, “wind their necks in”, and possibly my new favourite “cow-toe”, although I am still trying to figure that one out!)

Now to add my two cents to this discussion, and I will try to keep it short and sweet:

offering constructive criticism = good

offering negative/insulting criticism = bad

Post # 68
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I agree!  (With futuremrsny πŸ™‚

I haven’t received any “you get one day” comments myself because that’s not my situation, but I have recieved negative comments on posts that I wrote when I was totally emotional and looking for validation/some sort of stress relief, etc.  I’ve also gotten no replies, and if that was people holding their proverbial tongues so that they didn’t comment negatively, well, that’s the way to go then πŸ™‚

Post # 69
Member
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@eeniebeans:Neither did I πŸ™‚

 

You know, a couple that we know planned their wedding the day after ours. On purpose. And I did not whine to the ‘bee, or anyone for that matter.

Post # 70
Member
4590 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Guess what? You do only get one day (ok, techincally a couple if you add in showers and parties in your honor and that type of thing). Everyone coming to your wedding has a life outside of your wedding, and not everyone can pick up and make it. Some of hubs family couldn’t make the trip to MD from FL, and while it was sad that they couldn’t be there, there was nothing we could do about it.  You can’t expect everyone in your life to cater to your wedding, and while it sucks when close family can’t be there, such is life.  At least you will have pictures to show them, and stories to tell

Post # 71
Member
495 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

@Miss Smurf: It’s actually kowtow, and it has something to do with Japanese culture and bowing… As in bowing to someone’s everyone whim – Kowtow to someone’s every whim. We use it in the U.S.A too. πŸ™‚

Post # 72
Member
391 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think this thread should be renamed “Bridezilla Enablers Anonymous”

…just kidding. But seriously, 99% of the posts I have seen where a Bee gets told that she only gets one day, she is being completely irrational and it is well deserved. I agree with PP that when you come on a public forum, you should expect honest opinions. The purpose of the hive is not to have a full on pity party where everyone agrees with you…that would be pointless. If you want constant validation, don’t post on a public forum.

To be honest, I would rather have strangers talk me from the edge and let me know I am being irrational, before I go out and make a fool of myself in the real world!

Post # 73
Member
4590 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

@FutureMrsSitler: To be honest, I would rather have strangers talk me from the edge and let me know I am being irrational, before I go out and make a fool of myself in the real world!

^^ Umm yeah, what she said!!

Post # 74
Member
1392 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I don’t find that most grown women take well to posts like this that lecture everyone.   

I think the “you only get one day…” argument is very situational.  Sometimes it’s totally justified, sometimes not.

Kind of like the OP lecture here, it’s not all one size fits all and not every deserves to be slammed or hand slapped.   I, for one, have never said that on here, but have often thought it.   Some posts can be very over the top, some normal, since we’re all very different people in many different cities/countries, you have to take them with a grain of salt.

Seriously though, I wouldn’t waste a lot of energy over it. 

 

Post # 75
Member
3974 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

Sometimes, posters are being irrational. In my opinion, “Supporting” does not mean telling someone they are right even when they are being silly. A real friend actually HELPS you. If they didn’t want advice or the insight of others outside their situation, why post on a public forum?

eta: well, I know why. They want to be validated. Sometimes though, the masses just don’t agree with you. Posting on a public form and expecting everyone to pat you on the head and sympathize with you is silly.

Post # 76
Member
1147 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Miss Smurf:

HEHEHE,  the spelling is most definately NOT right,  dont google the way i spelled it!   LOL    

its meant to be spelled KOWTOW!   hehehe

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