(Closed) You had a baby before 25, Years later… did you make the right choice??

posted 7 years ago in Babies
  • poll: Now that you are older, did you make the right choice to have kids young?
    Yes I am so glad I had my first baby before age 25 : (22 votes)
    59 %
    No I wish I would have waited till I was a bit older. : (15 votes)
    41 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5572 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I don’t have anything to contribute yet but I’m really curious about this as well so I’ll be keeping an eye on this thread!

    Post # 4
    Member
    5655 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I had DS when I was 19, totally unplanned, but wouldn’t change it at all. I’m 26 this go round with #2 and think alot that if things had worked out differently it would’ve been nice to be atleast half way done with the baby making, instead of still on the first half (we want 2 to 3 more). lol

    Post # 5
    Member
    14486 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I cant anwer the poll, but I dont think you will find many people that will say they regret having a child when they did, especially if it was planned.  I am very curious as to the answers here, but I am going to venture a guess that most people will say they are  happy they had their child before 25 and wouldnt change it for the world.

    Post # 6
    Member
    6009 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I had my daughter at 25, and 1.5 years later, I think it was the perfect time for us.  I’m currently pregnant with #2 (will have him/her at almost 27), and I don’t think we could’ve planned it any better.

    Post # 8
    Member
    2548 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Well I was 21 when I has my son, and now its only 2 years later, so I know I’m not exactly the person you wanted to answer. But, for me right now, I have no regrets, and am so happy with where I am at.

    Post # 9
    Member
    5655 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2011

    @pinkshoes: I have friends that would DEFINITELY have like to have waited. They greatly struggled with the responsibility and not getting to do/live how they wanted. I was done with partying already when I had DS and stopped drinking completely by 23 so haivng him then didn’t change a whole lot… and I like being still young when he’s grown. lol

     

    OP: Now that I think about it, being young when DS graduates was a HUGE thing that I loved about having him young, and now get bummed out knowing I’ll be older by the time all our other children are grown. lol

    Post # 10
    Member
    14495 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I was 21 when I had DS, unplanned and single.  Was it the right choice, yes.  Do I wish I had waited, yes and no.  Any single parent will tell you it was hard and I only wish that I had someone to share the struggles and the joys with.  I, however, do think that having him early had some amazing benefits.  I am 40 and he is in college.  I am young enough to really enjoy the “empty nest”, I will be young enough to really enjoy and be active with not yet upcoming grandchildren.  I really enjoyed being a young mom, even though it was hard, in the end I was still a great mom and he is a great kid and that is all that really matters.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2512 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    First off, I LOVE my daughter. She is freaking awesome! 

    My life hasnt been so bad. Because of her I was able to push myself to go to college and work my butt to get a good job… and I wouldnt have done that without her (and the help from my parents). 

    BUT it hurts me that because I was so young I am basically working my way backwards. The “normal” order of things are usually… love..marriage… home… then baby. I went baby… finish school…. get a job…. fall in love… get married… now I am looking for a home. 

     
    And I had help from my parents for a lot of things but there were a lot of things I did alone (financially, emotionally). 
     
    Honestly I am having a tough time writing this post….. I don’t regret having her… but if I could have changed when I had her I would. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    1290 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    My son was unplanned when he was born I was 1 month past 21 and had been married a year and a half. I am glad I had him when I did, because I was a “young mom” and had I waited I probably wouldn’t have had him. I had my daughter at 30 and sometimes I feel “old” if that makes any sense, with relating to her. I think any time can be the right time or the wrong time. I wouldn’t trade either of them for the world! Laughing

    Post # 15
    Member
    295 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I had my son at 21, unplanned and single. I don’t have a single hesitation/regret about it.

    Mind you, I NEVER wanted children, NEVER wanted to get married- thought I would be a spinster for life with a million cats!

    The second I saw that positive pregnancy test, I literally fell in love! My son who is almost 9 now is the coolest thing that has ever happened to me, short of meeting my wonderful husband. If I had to go back and “do life over”, I would have made all the same choices.

    I was never much of a party girl so I don’t feel like I missed anything in that way. I already graduated college by the time my son was born and had a career going. I never missed out on traveling because I just took my son along for the trips. So, thankfully- I was in a good place to have him when I did.

    We are just now considering baby number 2 after 30 and I am more scared NOW than I was at 21!

    Post # 16
    Member
    3773 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    I had my first at 17, graduated, went to college, met Fiance, bought our home and had #2 at age 23. I would honestly not change anything. Having Dirty Delete made me grow up and gave me the motivation to want better for myself. I was in a really bad relationship and I don’t know if I would have ever left for me, but I knew it wasn’t good enough for her. I honsetly might not be alive today if I hadn’t had her so young.

    That being said, yes it is tough when you are young and are at a completely different point in your life then everyone else your age. But for Darling Husband and I having kids young has worked out well. We both have good jobs and will be able to travel and do things when are kids are gone to college-which if we don’t have anymore- I wil be 41 when we have an empty nest:)

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