(Closed) Young brides – why get married now?

posted 12 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 167
Member
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’m 20 years old, I’ve been with my Fiance for a little over a year, and we were engaged after only 7 months. However, we are waiting until Octber of next year to get married. Where I’m from this isn’t all too uncommon. Maybe I’m crazy for being engaged this young, but atleast I’m crazy in love. I’m not your typical 20 year old either. I’ve had long term relationships. I’ve had my heart broken. I’ve learned about myself and bettered myself. Divorce is NOT an option for me (unless abuse occurs, of course.) I am fully commited to my Fiance and our future. I know many people think that I should probably “live life” a little more before settling down, and I somewhat agree. That’s why we’re having a long engagement. However, I’ve always been mature for my age; life forced me to grow up fast, and I KNOW that my fiance is the one. I KNOW I want to spend forever with him and I WON’T give up easily. That’s why I got engaged after only 7 months and why I will be proudly rocking his last name at the young age of 21.

disclaimer: Now that I re-read this it sounds like I’m being defensive and a little rude, but I really didn’t mean for it to come out that way. I’m just explaining what’s going through my head 🙂

Post # 168
Member
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Younger brides might have a more prince charming outlook on marriage, like myself lol, where as an older bride 30+ might not have marriage as THE top priority. Then again Ill see circumstances where younger women are focused on school, friends, career and “older” women are feeling pressured to marry SOMEONE. I dont think marrying in haste is a good thing, can it work sometimes definately. Lifes funny that way…

Post # 169
Member
305 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My fiance and I are 21 but we’ve been together over 5 1/2 years so i feel getting married is the next step.

Post # 170
Member
34 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think personally think it’s ridiculous to judge wether or not someone should get married based on their age. Rather, it should be based on the maturity of the two parties involved, not the opinions of peers. 

Post # 172
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I am going to be 18 when I get married to my Fiance which I know seems really young to a lot of people but since he has decided to go into the marines our choice to get married got moved up. We live in Missouri and since obviously marine bases are on the coast the only way I could follow him would be for us to get married. We know that we want to spend the rest of our lives together and would have been okay with waiting longer to get married if the situation had been different then what it is. Its not aobut us wanting to get married right now just because we want to its because we want to be together and getting married is the only way that we can stay together with his choice in profession.

Post # 173
Member
39 posts
Newbee

Agree with lilyfaithMy FH and I met when we were 15 and have been unseperateable since then!  We are both 19 now and have been dating for 4 years.  Although we don’t plan to marry till we are 22, we feel like we got a “heads start” on love compared to most couples our age.  We aren’t rushing anything, we are just madly in love and ready to start a life together.  

Post # 174
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Love knows no time. It doesn’t have a calander, a time frame, a limit. When it happens, it hits you like a ton of bricks.

Age isn’t always a factor.

I love my fiance to death. We both know we want to marry one another. Why wait 5 years to make it official? If we both stick to our vows and mean them, it shouldn’t matter if we get married in 10 years or in 10 minutes.

Post # 175
Member
6414 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

Why get married now? Why not… lol Id like have another baby before I’m 30 and if we waited until after w had a baby wed have no money for a wedding our time either.

Post # 176
Member
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Some of us are at a different stage of life than our peers. Just like there are some people who are never ready to ‘settle down’, there are some who are ready to settle down in their early twenties.

I personally graduated high school at 16 so I’ve always been ‘ahead’ in that respect. My partner, though he dropped out at the age I graduated, has done three certifications since then.

We know people much older than us whose lives revolve around partying. Instead of spending all that time and money on basically nothing, we spend our time reading and are saving for a house.

Post # 177
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m still a waiting bee but I’ve been with my SO since we were fifteen. We are now twenty and plan on getting engaged soon and married when we are 21.  Yes, we have been together quite a while but you have to keep in mind that like us many people don’t believe in living together, having sex, etc. before marriage.  Many people, like you, recognize that their SO is “the one” very early and want to have the full experience of marriage and building a home and family together.  On the other hand there are many people out there that are just young, impulsive, and frankly stupid.  Just remember that some people have personal reasons.  My grandparents were 16 and 18 when they got married.  They met and were married three months later and I have never seen two people more in love!

Post # 178
Member
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’m not a “young bride” (late 20s) but for us it was because we want to have kids in the next few years and I was unwilling to have children outside of marriage.

Living in the UK now I absolutely think evangelical views on sex before marriage are the principal reason that Americans get married at much younger ages than in Europe.

I would love to know from young brides (23 and younger) how many of you are not living with and/or having sex with your FIs and if that is a factor as to why you need to get married at that age. Of my friends in college who got married with the exception of the Mormons all are divorced, and in those cases their parents would not let their BF live with them or move to the college town unless they were married.

Post # 179
Member
401 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

@shady_lane:  I’m a young bride, 22 at the moment, and will be 23 when we marry in January. I’ve been with my Fiance for 5 years, and we live together and have sex. But I don’t live in America nor am i religious. We’re getting married because we love each other and feel like now’s the right time..there’s no rush, but why wait either?

Post # 180
Member
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I really don’t feel like we rushed. We lived together a year and a half before we got together. We married when I was 21, but I treated the relationship as serious as marraige when we moved in together. We’d like a family and we can support ourselves, so we decided to get married.

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