- Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House
I don’t know that his anger problems are that big of a deal, considering he’s only 23. It sounds like he is a little immature and has a really hard time dealing with frustration. I used to have a hard time with that too, but getting older really helped. The part of your brain that controls foresight isn’t even fully developed until 25, and that has a lot to do with arguments and other behavior management.
That said, I can relate to your situation. I got married at 23 to my high school sweetheart, too. I also experienced a lot of the same doubtful thoughts- I had been with him through all of my formative years, so what if I just didn’t know that I was missing out on something better? What if being single was amazing? What if I didn’t really know myself? In my situation, I got married anyway, but it was because it was a logical decision. I do love him and I’m attracted to him, but he’s also a great provider, he will make an amazing father, and his family is great. If I had left him to experience myself, I would just be looking for someone else like him.
It’s been almost three years since I got married, and I actually have a great deal of independence within my marriage. My biggest factor in being happy with that decision is that you really can’t have everything with any major decision. You can’t be single until 29 but also celebrate your 50th anniversary before your 75th birthday. You can’t keep your current job and move to a new one. You can’t live where you do now and move to a new place. Both paths have merits, and downsides.
For me, it really depended on whether my life with him was the one I wanted anyway. Deciding that it was made getting married really easy.
Do you guys want the same things in life? Are you happy with his intelligence, work ethic and ambition? Does he support your goals? Is he making an effort to grow up more and control his emotions? If you broke up, and you dated someone else, what would you be looking for in that guy?
One last thing I want to say is that had I decided not to get married, my life would have been different, but I would be fine. I’d have gotten a full time job somewhere, maybe moved to a different city, but I really would be fine. So would he. We both would have found someone else.