(Closed) "Your bump is weird"

posted 5 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 16
Member
2449 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

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julies1949:  nicely played! Gets the point across and says get off my back in a polite but firm manner.  

She sounds awful but the more you can hold your ground the better off you’ll be. Not necessarily confronting but just standing firm. 

Post # 17
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

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Daizy914:  Next comment she makes, just respond with “That’s pretty rude and insensitive”. Call her out calmly and she’ll either reconsider the stuff she’s saying or keep making those comments, but either way, the she’ll definitely look like a jerk to the rest of your coworkers.

Some people have a weird sense of humor and have no idea their words come off hurtful, while some are secretly (and passive agressively) taking out their own feelings on you by making “jokes”. Maybe she is jealous, who knows.

Post # 18
Member
479 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

Most people don’t like to be put in awkward situations but sometimes rude people like her have to be put on the spot! I would have said “Yes I’m pouting because your rude and inconsiderate and I hope one day you don’t have any kind of difficulties while your pregnant.

I’m sorry! People suck! (some people ) 

Post # 19
Member
1034 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

People really suck sometimes. I’m 19 weeks tomorrow and coworkers (even people in other departments that I barely know) think they NEED to address the fact that I’m pregnant every time they see me. And say whatever they want. And offer unsolicited advice. And my favorite- act shocked when I say I’m “only” 19 weeks along because I really popped last week and my belly is “so big.” Which is really isn’t, IMO. They’re just not used to seeing a pregnant belly on me. It’s just the nature of going through a process thats so visible to everyone. I try to grin and bear it, or throw out a quick comeback without being too bitchy, but at the end of the day I need to follow my own advice more and just let it roll off my back. Some people don’t have filters and may not necessarily mean to offend you. They just don’t have anyone in their personal lives that helps them establish boundaries because they get away with saying whatever they want. Good luck, I feel your pain.

Post # 20
Member
8940 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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Daizy914:  Does this co-worker even know what’s IN the bump? Does she think fetuses (feti?) are perfectly round little balls that suddently morph into human shape upon birth? There’s a frickin BABY in there, of course it’s not a perfect sphere. What a moron! When I was 8 months pregnant I was giving a presentation at work and my co-workers got to see a foot skateboard kick all the way from right to left. Talk about a weird bump! Just ignore dumbasses, or practice saying “So’s your face.”

Post # 21
Member
4426 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

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Daizy914:  What a rude person. Here’s a trick I learned (I’m a teacher so have to call behavior out all the time): the more calm you are, the scarier you can be. So the next time (because I’m sure there will be a next time) she says something, take a deep breath, and then say something as simple as “Do you realize how rude you are being?”, look at her for a second, and then walk away. Not much else is needed. When you inform someone they are rude, not much else is needed. If it still persists, then a clear “Listen, this is not okay and makes me uncomfortable. Do not make another comment about me or my pregnancy.”

Post # 22
Member
3823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

 

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sept22insf:  +1

honestly who stares at a pregnant woman’s stomach…OR ANYONE’S STOMACH that hard without being a freak or weirdo?

Post # 23
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

She’s a bully. She is used to talk before she thinks and people are too embaressed to tell her she’s making everyone unconfortable. I would call her out on this behavior. To be honest, I think she’s jealous. Don’t let her put you down. She is just a sad person 😉

Post # 24
Member
88 posts
Worker bee

+10000 I agree so much, ask her why she would say that? Make her explain the comments and just act confused?? She’s being a huge bitch and a lot of people like that never stop because they’re always “just joking” or you’re just “sensitive, prob cuz your pregnant” and bottom line is if you don’t think its funny she shouldn’t think it’s ok… And if she didn’t get the questioning I’d say something like “I didnt think it looked weird until you said something…. Now I’m just praying it doesn’t look like yours after baby is born!!”

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this, FWIW if I had been C I would’ve at least made some comment “omg A! Why would you ever tell a pregnant woman her belly looks weird? thats mean!!”

Post # 25
Member
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

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KatiePi:  best advice!

Post # 26
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Aw I’m sorry, I’m sure you look beautiful and your bump is perfect.

  I had a very annoying co-worker when I was pregnant last time – she would constantly tell me what I should name my son and would even email me lists of (horrible) baby names/go around the building telling people she picked out his name, she would comment on what I ate and how I looked… thank god she was fired and she isn’t around to pester me about this pregancy.  I just started ignorning her for the most part.  Unfortuantely she sat right behind me so I couldn’t avoid her totally but I would stop giving her attention if she stopped by my desk to talk, I just wouldn’t even turn around to look at her.  Maybe if you just disengage with this co-worker she’ll take then hint.  Mine never did, but it’s worth a shot? 

I also had a couple people I didn’t know at work ask when I was due, I would tell them, and they said “are you sure…??” Because I looked bigger than I should I guess.  People are just rude, they feel like they can say things to you while your pregnant that normally they wouldn’t say.  I don’t get it.

Post # 27
Member
356 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Laurel Rock Farms, PA

I would just try to keep my distance from her.  Kind of sounds like jealousy to me.  If she continues just make a known fact that everyone’s pregnancy is different and everyone’s body is different.  Women are bitches haha we all can be times 🙂

Post # 28
Member
1113 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

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Daizy914:  I will admit, my bump is weird-shaped (as in its not what I always thought it was supposed to look like!) but if someone said that TO me, well, that’s a paddlin’!

but in all seriousness, I try to be as nice as possible but your co-worker sounds like a total B. It’s not even that she said it that’s the worst part is that’s shr acknowledged that she saw it didn’t sit well with you and continued on. I wonder if she’s aware she was a total jerk? 

Post # 29
Member
7897 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

What an awful thing to say! I wonder if she had a bad childhood or has a lot of stresses going on, causing her to behave so inappropriately. It’s not really a good excuse, but there must be something going on with her. 

Post # 30
Member
769 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

My bump looks like a weird growth or a tumor. I’m definitely not one of those pregnant ladies that has a cute bump. It just looks awkward. However, no one’s been douchie enough to comment on it. If they were, I would punch them in the teeth. Your co-worker is a c-u-next-Tuesday.

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