(Closed) your husband/boyfriend/fiance being your "best friend" or not

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Would you say that your fiance is your "best friend"?

    Yes

    No, I have a platonic best friend

  • Post # 77
    Member
    196 posts
    Blushing bee

    My SO is definitely my best friend, and I know he thinks of me the same way. We have other people we are close to, but no one who I am nearly as close with as I am with him.

    Post # 78
    Member
    519 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Absolutely, beyond any doubt, my husband is my best friend. We’ve known each other since kindergarten and both of us have always felt some connection to one another. Of course I had other people I considered best friends before we had dated for a while, but the longer we dated, the more our friendship grew. And our friendship outshined any of the friendships that I had with others. It was just so much more meaningful and I had so much more fun with him. And I still feel the same way. We’ve been together for 8 years now and I’d say out of those 8 years, he’s been my best friend for about 5 years. As soon as I find out something, he’s the first one I want to tell. He’s the one I have those silly, meaningless conversations with. He’s the one that I have those serious, in-depth conversations with. He’s the ONLY one that I can truly be myself around. Everyone else only gets a portion of the real me.

    I honestly find it odd that others do not feel this way. I guess it really depends on personalities and how you ended up with you SO, etc. For example, us knowing each other and being friends all through school probably helped to build the foundation of becoming best friends.

    Post # 79
    Member
    1430 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    He is my best friend. In fact there have been times in the past where he’s had to tell me to shut up about some stuff, like complaining about one of my psycho exes who attempted to semi stalk me. Just because I am so comfortable with talking about anything and everything with him. It’s also why after when we broke up and my ex wanted me back, I told him that wasn’t going to happen if it meant I had to stop talking to him. I love having him in my life and would be sad if he wasn’t there anymore. I dealt with that once before and I ended up crying all night because I missed him so much.

    Post # 80
    Member
    2522 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I’m the kind of person that has many acquaintances and just a few close friends. I rarely get close enough to people to let them really know the real me. I use a lot of humor and sarcasm to block my true feelings about things to keep people at bay.

    I have 3 girl friends that I can tell a lot of deep things to. M.A. being the top of that tier. She knows things about me that not even my oldest “best girl friend” knows about me.

    However, with SO (FI next month, aahh!) there is a level of intimacy that just cannot be matched by ANY of my friends. He knows things about me that I never talked to anyone about because I was ashamed. He knows things that I have done that are pitiful, and things that are great. With him, for the first time in my life, I felt like I could be emotionally weak in front of someone and they would catch me, hold me, and love me just the same. Such safety.

    For the relationships throughout my life, I had always been in the role of the emotional supporter, the backbone. It’s exhausting ignoring your emotional needs and always taking care of someone else. I do not fault anyone for these feelings I’ve had throughout the years. I never resented my friends or family. We as people become different sides of ourselves as we interact with others: you do not interact the same with your mother as you do with your friends, for instance. We adapt to our environment.

    But the questions nagged me: when will I be at ease?

    I can say that SO is my best friend because I can be emotionally naked without guilt or anxiety. I am at a peace and happiness that just isn’t present in the relationships I have with others. We are like oversize, comfortable coats in the winter time. We wrap each other gently, all-encompassing.

    Post # 81
    Member
    2084 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    My SO is soooooo my bff even though I have 4 main gf who have been my bff since grade school. It’s definitely on a different level for my SO and I we talk and say and do practically everything aroung each other. We can talk about anything or anyone for that matter. It’s this balance thats unexplainable thats why he’s my perfect fit!!!!

    Post # 82
    Member
    24 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    No, not my best friend.  We were friends before, and I love hanging out with my Fiance (romantically and also just having fun) and we talk about everything, but we both have best friends.  My Fiance is my Fiance 🙂

    Post # 83
    Member
    6256 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2014

    No.

    My ex-fiance was my best friend. Turns out you need more than friendship to keep a relationship afloat. 

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