- 4 years ago
- Wedding: City, State
Do what’s right for you now.
Do what’s right for you now.
Definitely depends on the person. I got engaged when I was 23 after a pretty short relationship and it was one of the stupidest things I’d ever agreed to. Luckily, I came to my senses shortly afterwards but it was definitely a sign that I didn’t really know who I was, what I wanted etc. I was a people pleaser who couldn’t say no to anyone even when every fibre of my being was screaming ‘DO NOT DO THIS!’
I met my now husband 2 years later and we got married when I was 31. I was much more secure in who I was and what I wanted and needed out of life.
So for me, 25 is way too early. And I must admit my experiences and the relationships I see around me make me think that 25 is generally too young.
But that’s just my experience, I’d never judge anyone else who wanted to get married that young. If you’ve got your shit together, it’s a perfectly valid choice. If you know who you are, or find someone to grow with, great!
I will have just turned 25 when we get married, have been together since I was 18. I think it is more about the person and their maturity rather than a set age. My Fiance would not have been ready at 25 but I am.
I got married at 24 and divorced at 26 (ex was 30 when we married). I went though some major life changes from 23-25 that really made me change my mind about things I found unacceptable in a relationship like laziness, making excuses, taking advantage of me etc. That change of perspective meant that my ex was no longer the right person for me. So personally, I was too young to get married.
However, I do think it’s possible to complete that ‘life change’ phase at a younger age. It just depends on what’s happened in your life.
Nope! I got married at 22
I think it really depends on a lot of different factors. Generally, people change a great amount up until the age of about 25, some even up until 30. So sometimes it is harder for couples who marry young because they change so much before 25 and see themselves growing apart. Which is unfortunate. I will be 25 when we get married in September, but my Fiance will be 30. We are 5.5 years apart. We will have been together for almost 4 years, living together for nearly 3 years and owned a house together for over a year. I am finishing my Bachelor’s degree in April, and will be hopefully starting my career job shortly after I finish school. Whereas, my Fiance has been working full time for 5 years now. Given our age gap, this is completely normal and he is super supportive and we really work well as a team to make our financial situation work until I finish school. I think people at any age have struggles to get through and it ultimately depends on how good your relationship is and how much both people are willing to work on it, comprise and he understanding through times of change.
I really don’t think you can put an age on the perfect time to get married. I got married at 21 and my husband was 27- it was the perfect time for us. I’ve always been an old soul and knew since our first date that I was going to marry him.
Others need more time before settling down- they may not be so sure initially, want to travel/explore, be alone for a while, spend time living together first- the reasons are endless. I don’t think there’s a right way or a wrong way, but I certainly don’t think that 25 is young. In our grandparent’s generation, at 25 you had been married for 5-7 years and likely had a few kids.
I can’t stand people like this. I’m sure if you were 30 (despite what she said about waiting) she would’ve had some other judgmental comment to make about how you’d better not wait too long if you want to have children. You just can’t win with some people.
As others have said, 20s may be perceived as the age of extended adolescence these days, but, where I’m from, people usually have (most) of their sh*t together by 25. That’s usually when people are either beginning their careers or finishing graduate school (again, where I’m from).
My SO’s father had 2 children by the age of 25, and my parents were married at 20 (my mom) and 25 (my dad). It’s funny to me how judgmental some older people are and I sometimes wonder if it has to do with personal regrets or some strange superiority complex.
I will be getting married a month after my 25th birthday, and my Fiance will be 27. We’ve been together for almost a decade, have steady careers, own a house, and have plenty in savings with no debt. We had some rough patches, but we grew together through them and haven’t had any issues like that in several years.
I feel ready at 25. That said, what I described is a very particular set of circumstances. If you live with your parents and have a lot of debt, I don’t see the harm in waiting until your late twenties or early thirties. The same applies if you’ve only known each other a couple of years. It really is up to the individuals.
For me, I know that I am a different person then I was in my mid 20’s. What I wanted in a partnership has changed, what I expect from myself has changed, and what I want in my partner has changed.
So for my opinion, yes it is too young. However, there are people that at that age are ready and will make it work.
That’s really weird. I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut to people like that.
Anyway, to answer your question, to me, 25 seems young, but it’s up to you. I got married at 27 and that was a few years ago, so even 27 seems young to me now. If you are ready to get married and you’re in a good place in your relationship, then it’s not up to her to say.
But EVERYONE is so different. You can’t place us all into the same mold.
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