Post # 1
Just wanted to see what you bees would do in my situation. We had all of our vendors booked and deposits paid last year for a September 2017 wedding, but had to cancel in March 2017 because I was diagnosed with cancer and needed 6 months of chemo. I know some people would have still gone through with it, but I did not want to risk spending so much money on this big event and not be able to enjoy it. We had no idea how my body would react after chemo so we just cancelled everything and eloped right after my first treatment. Never looked back since!
Fast forward 4 months and 9 treatments later (3 more left yay!!)… I’m starting to think about whether we should try to fight for some of the deposits back.
Venue – $1500
Catering – $3000
DJ with photobooth – $700
When we cancelled in March, the vendors told us that we could get some of the money back if they found a couple getting married on our date Sept. 3. We kept checking in with them periodically and as of yesterday, still nothing. I thought the chances were slim from the beginning because most couples nowadays want about a year to plan a wedding, less than 6 months is short in the wedding world. So after we eloped, I accepted the fact that we wouldn’t get our money back and was fine with it. Who cares about $5200 when you have cancer to deal with? But my parents, family members and friends keep saying that’s ridiculous that they would keep the deposits and we should get them all back under the circumstances. My sister wants to fight with the vendors and my brother wants to leave bad reviews on my behalf…
From what I know about the wedding industry, it’s not personal, it’s just business. You knowingly sign a contract that says the deposit is non-refundable, so is there any room for arguing? Would you fight with them or just move on?
Post # 2
Personally, I’d let it go. I’m an attorney. I do the fighting on BEHALF of my clients and it still stresses them out.
Post # 3
I’m all for Facebook/yelp reviews. People tend to want those gone. Might give you some leverage. But it is just business. They reserved a date, probably declined other people after, and now they are out money too.
Also, this is sneaky, you could use a fake email and inquire about your date with those vendors, to be absolutely sure they didn’t rebook.
Post # 4
I think you should let it go. That’s what contracts are for and you signed it. It would have been nice if they had offered you a refund due to your circumstances (if you shared them with the vendor) but they are under no obligation to do so.
Post # 5
I would let it go especially if they abided by the rules of the contract. I would drive by the venue on 9/3 and see if a wedding is happening…first-hand surveillance 🙂
Post # 6
I think it’s worth a try! All they can do is say no, and then you can decide what to do from there. I like to think there are decent people out there who would want to show some compassion. Also, 6 months might be short notice for the venue, but I don’t think it’s that short for the DJ and caterer.
Post # 8
I don’t think it’s outrageous for them to keep the deposits. As awful as your situation is they are a business and they can’t make exceptions for everyone, there are so many bad situations people find themselves in but the rules can’t be changed for everyone, particularly given your date was quite close when you canceled.
Post # 9
I think that if you had changed the date with them and done the wedding later they would have not kept the deposits but unfortunately you signed contracts, etc. I think at this point it’s better to let it go – the stress this may create may affect your treatments, and at the end of the day your health is more important than this money.
Post # 10
While I think it would be nice for them to give you back the deposits given the situation, it’s just not something you can count on. If it were, everyone who got dumped, eloped to avoid family or whatever could just cry “medical!” to get their money back – they can’t demand you prove it. However I do think there’s no reason you can’t just call and see if they booked the date or not; it’s not really their responsibility to call you, though it’d be nice. Hope you’re doing well!
Post # 11
Check the venue on Sept 3 to make sure it has not been rebooked.
Then, talk to the vendors. See if they will credit your deposit if you reschedule. Most probably would have if you had rescheduled rather than cancelled initially.
Post # 12
You signed contracts so I don’t think the vendors are in the wrong or that it’s ethical to leave them bad reviews. Life happens and people have to cancel weddings for tragic reasons, but that doesn’t nullify the contracts that were signed.
Post # 13
I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
Two things, one, did you share with them what your circumstances are? I would imagine some people would want to try to help you out with at least a partial refund. You should definitely try.
The second is did you discuss moving your date out and seeing if you could use your deposit towards another date?
Post # 14
Wait, so you’re suggesting she write a FB review because she was diagnosed with cancer, cancelled the wedding 6 months prior and never used their services?
That’s bad karma and just wrong.
I’m completely sympathetic to OP. My uncle, who was like a father to me, passed away from cancer in Sept 2016. He struggled on and off for 17 years.
I don’t blame OP for eloping when she found out she was sick, and I hope she’s going well now. However, that’s just added stress. I would suggest asking, but that should of been asked back in March (I realize that was not a priority at the time, her life was, and rightfully so). There’s a very little chance for the deposit to be refunded in July 2017. OP can always ask, but I wouldn’t fight over it. Stress is really rough on the body, specially cancer patients and survivors.
I suggest OP read the contacts, and if it’s not stated that they are entitled to it, she needs to let it go.
Post # 15
Is it possible to use the deposits for a smaller event? Maybe you could have a small party to celebrate with friends and family when you’re done with chemo.
i disagree with bees who have recommended that you leave bad reviews for this… Many people in the wedding industry are small family owned operations and try very hard to make their customers happy. Some things are out of their control and unfortunately no refunds means just that…
Perhaps the venue could advertise your old wedding date as a discounted date with the hopes of you regaining at least a percentage of your deposit.
If they don’t rebook I would definitely see what sort of event you could get for what you’ve already paid.