(Closed) You’re getting married…when?!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Hostess
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I think you can totally be in another wedding before yours. You may need to talk the bride and let her know that, of course, you’re there for her, but you also have your own wedding to deal with. She’s likely to completely understand.

I’m going to be a bridesmaid in one of my bridesmaid’s weddings just two weeks before ours, and I’m not worried. My friend is great, and she’ll totally understand my needs and restrictions, just as I will understand hers.

Financially speaking, let them worry about their finances. It’s sweet of you to be concerned, but they’ll do what they are able and comfortable with.

I know it’s frustrating that they’re getting married so close to you, but unfortunately, we each only have claim to our one day. I’ve had to remind myself of that fact many times! But don’t worry, I promise you’ll each still have all the wonderful-ness you deserve.

Post # 5
Hostess
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

@Lulu910: That’s what my friend and I have been saying too. How cool it is that we’ll start our married lives at almost the exact same time AND get to be a part of each other’s weddings!

Plus, adopting that outlook (even if it takes some effort), is WAY more fun than being upset about it.

Post # 6
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

One of my bridesmaids made her wedding (that I am supposed to be in) a week after ours in the states (we live in Canada).

Fiance and I were going to attend and go on a later hm, but after other issues with her, I just do not feel the need to put the money and energy into this!

If your friends live nearby you, I don’t see it being a huge deal, especially if you can work out a deal to not exchange gifts (I would have no problem with that if I were in their shoes).  Just try to compromise on both of your parts, it’s all you can do I guess.

Post # 7
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee

This is so exciting! My two best friends are getting married less than two weeks apart from each other this summer too, and each bride is in the other’s bridal party (hah and I’m in both, of course). I think you will find that many of the things you are worried about (putting additional stress on your stretched budgets and limited time) will be things you can communicate about easily with a friend who is going through the exact same thing! 

Enjoy planning together, and if you have a lot of overlapping friends, embrace the awesomeness that is joint bachelorette parties or showers! 

Oh, and congratulations! 

Post # 8
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

You can definately do it! Think of their wedding day as a day to sit back and relax. Have fun and enjoy the anticipation of you and your fh getting married soon after. It’ll be a day where you don’t have to stress or worry about any details.

 It’s an honor to be in their wedding and you should be delighted that even though they may be tight on a budget they still want to show you how much they care for you.

 maybe instead of requesting not to give gifts suggest to have dinner together at your home as newlyweds. Spending time together is always better than a gift, that could be a very special moment for 2 couples who got married so close together. 

enjoy this time and have fun with it

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