(Closed) “You’re trying…BEFORE the wedding?”

posted 7 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
7291 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

They probably don’t know your background and how important kids are to you guys as a famiy! I say rock it out! Even if you do nail it on the head the first time, two months is not enough time to show like crazy πŸ˜‰

Also in most places it canshameful to be pregnant before marriage. Like someone will calculate the childs birth date and your wedding date and start making assumptions like you got married just b/c you are pregnant! Stick to you love ones who know all the truths and what matters πŸ™‚

Post # 5
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

honestly most of the people in my family got married because they are pregnant. not that they weren’t getting married anyway, they just had to move up the wedding a few months! and guess what, they are happy and healthy and it worked out πŸ™‚

i’m sorry not everyone in your life can be supportive! we also got some flack because we bought a house before getting married, but it was the right choice for us. and i’m sure TTC is the right move for you, if you’re sure, go for it!

Post # 7
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Pfff why do they think they have a say in your baby making plans? Good luck & have funnnnnn πŸ˜‰

Post # 8
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Maybe just don’t share that with people? It’s really no one’s business anyway, if you don’t tell people you’re TTC right now you can avoid some annoying questions.

Post # 9
7606 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Hey, this reminded me of this thread from earlier!

Trying for a Baby Before the Wedding

I think if you want to try before the wedding, then go for it!  It’s not like people haven’t figured out that you’re having sex, you know?  Like Miranda from SATC said, “The jig is up.” lol

Good luck TTC!!!!!!

Post # 10
1466 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Father's Vineyard Church/ A Touch of Class Banquet Center

I’m sorry that people put you in awkward positions like that. People suck sometimes. Mr. D and I will probably start trying next year as well due to some fertility issues (my ovaries hate me, or should I say, cysts hate my ovaries), and when I have told people that, they are like “So soon after the wedding? You should enjoy being married too.” I just want to be like, “I’m glad you have/had the option of waiting. If I want biological kids then I can’t. Thanks for pointing that out though.” Sigh. I know they mean well, but sometimes I just want to tell them to shove it. Hugs!

Post # 11
3624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@KatyElle: I agree. Even if you’re 8 weeks pregnant at your wedding, you wouldn’t have had to  tell anyone by then.

Post # 12
3501 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2002

I am 100% in the SAME boat as you!

Post # 13
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Meh, I’d probably just not mention that we’re trying because it’s none of their business when we’re pulling the goalie.  My very close friends and my mom and sister know we’re trying (along with you know, the bees), but that’s it.  It’s totally whatever you’re comfortable with sharing, but I can see people being surprised you’d be willing to get pregnant before your wedding without massive backstory that I would just get sick of explaining.

Post # 14
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@AmeliaBedelia: We are ttc and the wedding isnt untill may. Not that i see my lovely overies letting me get pregnant anytime soon. The doctor pretty much told me that i wouldnt get pregnant on my own. so why not start trying so that its a little bit less of a weight? πŸ™‚

Post # 15
1774 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I am a private person, and my reaction to your post was wondering why you were telling people.  If you get pregnant before the wedding, they will know soon enough, and if you don’t, then they really didn’t need to know and will likely only lead to judgment.  Best of luck with TTC!

Post # 16
6473 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011 - Sydney, Australia

We started TTC this time last year {nearly to the day!} – and at the time, that was with six months to go before the wedding. Crazy, hey? But I knew I would have issues conceiving (and here we are, 1 year later…) and I was willing to be a bride with a belly! Don’t let anyone else get you down! x

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